3 year old ds won't sleep at night! Help!

[mannicmummyhavinaiccy]

My 3 1/2 year old son won't sleep at all at night, I'm due dc3 in a few weeks and can feel a break down coming on if I'm up with 2 all night! He has always been a broken sleeper who would wake at 5.30 am but that was bearable. Now he screams when you put him to bed and shouts and fake cries all night, to day I've been up from 2.20 am and am finding it hard to cope! It started a few months ago, he seamed to be having nightmeres, but he just seems to use, I've had a bad dream as an excuse now, he has a fake cry, more like a shout that is driving us all mad! I have tried a reward chart, taking toys away ect but nothing seems to work, I'm really at my wits end! :(

Oh Lord, that sounds like a nightmare.

My DS is 20 months and has never been a great sleeper. I know it sounds harsh, but I have to leave him to scream sometimes. I'll go in, check he's ok, give him a dummy / water if he needs it, then leave him.

He scream the place down but seems to get it in the end.

Maybe not much use to you as your DS is older? But I hope it works out for you

Pol x

We have exactly the same thing with our nearly 3yo DD. Wakes several times in the night and is insistent someone goes in to her and cries and has tantrum if they don't. Also have an 18 month old who wakes very early (5ish). We have also tried everything - reward chart, gro clock etc. I have to say I am now going down the tough love route of leaving her to cry on the basis that nothing seems to work. Only problem is she takes her nappy off and has a dirty protest on the floor...!

When I read Toddler Taming (some time ago), the main message from it was that what toddlers want is 100% of your attention 100% of the time and they will use fair means or foul to get it.
This sounds like a (difficult!) manifestation of that, personally, I would leave him, put a gate across his room and ensure that he is not getting your attention at night, Supernanny's silent return to bed thing would be an alternative if you can't bear to just leave him.
Also he is old enough to understand lots now so I'd be having lots of daytime conversations about being a big boy, what is expected of him etc.
Hope this helps, you have my sympathy, you must be exhausted!

If you can't do the leaving to cry route, have you tried audio books? If he stays in bed, lying down he can have one on quietly, but if he gets up or yells it goes off? If it works, he'll nod off listening to it, so worth a go if you haven't tried it yet. Hope you solve it. DS was like that - drove me to the brink of madness.