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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

how to answer dd's questions on where babies come from?

16 replies

neverlookback · 26/01/2011 21:29

hi i have 2 dc's and im pg with my 3rd my dd who is 5.3yo has been asking about babies and come up with some tricky questions that im not sure how much to explain to her, not only does she as how the baby gets in mummys tummy and where does it start but as she has decided she never wants babies of her own as she never wants to go into hospital (bless her) she wants to know how do you not ever have a baby!! she knows how babies come out and is fine with that but can you help me answer her, i dont like making silly stuff up i like to try and be honest but want to be age appropiate, thanks x

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cece · 26/01/2011 21:31

Tell her daddy's make the seed and mummy's make the egg. This is what makes a baby. It seemed to satisfy my DC at that age!

Tell her when she is older you will tell her how to stop making a baby but at the moment it is not possible so she doesn't need to know.

cece · 26/01/2011 21:33

Oh and if she wants more info tell her mummys and daddys have special cuddles and that is now daddys sperm gets into the mummys tummy to join with the egg.

Restrainedrabbit · 26/01/2011 21:35

Just tell her the truth, my DD is nearly five and I have answered her questions honestly. She is very accepting of the answers :) I told her that if ladies want to not grow a baby they can take a special pill/tablet that stops the body growing a baby.

Pterosaur · 26/01/2011 21:35

Be honest, simple and brief (I have a tendency to over-explain and sometimes end up talking to an empty room).

This book is good. It says 6 and up, but if your dd is interested, I think it would be about right.

Restrainedrabbit · 26/01/2011 21:35

(oh and I have 3DCs, last one is nearly 16 weeks)

llareggub · 26/01/2011 21:37

My DS is 4 and often asks questions about this. I've always told him the truth but I only answer his direct questions and nothing more.

We've got as far as there being a sperm and an egg and where these come from but he doesn't know how the two things meet, although I think he is building up to it. He has asked how the baby comes out and but I declined the request from him to see exactly where!

jollyma · 26/01/2011 21:46

Ds1 was 6 when i was pregnant and had lots of questions. I answered as honestly as i could and only answered the questions he asked. It is easy to get carried away and give too much info. The hardest one was when he asked how the sperm came out of the daddy and if the mummy swallowed the sperm to get it to the egg. The usbourne flip flap body book is at a good level for a five year old.

Karoleann · 26/01/2011 21:58

I'd recommend mummy laid an egg too. ds1 (4) started asking lots of questions too when I first got pregnant. When they're so little its quite easy as they're so matter of fact about everything.

Original poster

neverlookback · 27/01/2011 11:54

brilliant thanks, i told her i would get back to her but i might just wait till she asks again!! and ill have a look for those books too.

OP posts:

daytoday · 27/01/2011 12:11

My DS was 4.5 when DD arrived. He wanted to know about it all. I answered his questions honestly - but I only answered the question he was asking. Never more, never less.

Eventually he wanted to know about how dad's seed got to the egg. I was worried, but I told him what happened in a way that was right for him. By 6 knew all the facts. He forgot them and has re-asked. He was a bit 'urgh' but to be honest he was far more interested in football and his own life. He took the information in his stride. The younger you know, the better I think - but only when a child asks and is interested.

I don't believe in taboos, stigmas or with holding. My mum told me when I was about 5. She was always very honest with me.

Flick forwards, I was probably the last one of my friends to loose my virginity at 18 - to a long term boyfriend I was in love with. I think my mum got the mechanics out of the way so she could spend far more time talking about the emotions, making good choices etc, being treated with respect etc.

coldtits · 27/01/2011 12:15

mummy has an egg. daddy makes it work with a seed he puts in with a special cuddle. The baby grows, and mummy pushes out of a special hole near her bum, like a poo.

I REALLY don;t understand why people get so silly about this, it's a basic biological function.

KikiJane · 27/01/2011 12:58

The 'special cuddle' thing makes me sick in my mouth a bit. It's a ridiculous clichéd way of putting it.

I have always answered my childrens' questions honestly and however they come. I don't give them more info than they ask for, but the questions usually turn into a discussion anyway. Sometimes there's giggling (theirs and mine), sometimes there's "eeeew, that's gross!", but I'm happy that they're informed.

They will ask questions when they're ready to hear the answers.

coldtits · 27/01/2011 15:03

Well, of course you could say "daddy puts his penis into mummy and quickly ejaculates, which makes mummy very frustrated and causes an argument!" - but I think there is such a thing as TMI with small childen.

KikiJane · 27/01/2011 15:20

I'm surprised at someone who says "I REALLY don;t understand why people get so silly about this, it's a basic biological function" using the "special cuddle" line.

coldtits · 27/01/2011 15:29

Because I have a child with ASD, and I don't want him to decide to put his penis in anyone - I've been deliberately vague.

jaffacake79 · 27/01/2011 15:32

Be honest. But age appropriately.

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