Sleep training/routine - how do you fit it in and a social life (for you and baby)?

[Sassles]

My DS is now 8 months old. We have ok sleeping at night most nights. I had managed to get him to fall asleep in his cot on occasion (with me still in the room) a month or two ago (usually needs to fall asleep at boob or on shoulder), but this has regressed massively due to a bit of separation anxiety and terrible cough, vomitting bug, cold and then croup since mid Dec. He is still not really very well and now needs to snuggle in to me to fall asleep, or will eventually wail to sleep on Dad's shoulder (if we are lucky).

I'm sure this can be fixed, but not a huge fan of any crying and did previously give controlled crying a go and he would literally scream for hours (even with me in room), so not sure that is really an option. I want to wait till he is well (or at least not croupy) to try breaking this habit and have till end of April when he is gran looks after him. She also has another 2 under four, so will nto be able to hold him for hours till he sleeps.

My question really is, how do you start a sleep routine and still manage to socialise with other mum's and babies? Maybe I'm being dense, but most classes etc, seem to be at times when a nap would be in order. I've read that he should be up at 7, then back for nap at 9.45 ish for an hour then back for nap at 1.30ish for an hour and a half then another nap at 4ish for 30 mins. With meals fit in around this, it doesnt leave much time to go to classes, or to other mum's houses. Would you just need to go for an hour then leave to get back for nap time?
Or are you pretty much stuck in the house till the routine is in place? Factor in other mum's are trying to do this too and prob all managing diff levels of success and you really can't say you'll meet up at a certain time without giving up on getting LO to sleep to make a meet.

Well don't worry about sleep "training" until he's better. I put training in speech marks because I don't know any adult who is rocked to sleep

As for naps, do what works for you not what the books say.

My DS would wake around 6, nap at half 8/9, again at 12, again at 3 around 9 months old. You can have yours take naps in a pushchair when you're out an about? Some babies will nap for 45 mins in your lap.
I structured my day around DS TBH to get him used to his routine. As he's got older (15 months) I know when he naps and can put him down for one if we're at the grandparents, stick in the buggy if we're shopping (doesn't always work though!). However he takes most naps at home and we go out inbetween because everything is local so it works for us.

I found that around 9/10 months, DS napped at 8.30/9 then 12.30 (still does) so that gives you afternoons for meets and plenty of time for morning classes.

You could decide that fhe lunchtime nap is most important and atructure your days around that?

What Iggly said. It's difficult, especially get-togethers with lots of different babies IMO as they're all on slightly different timings.

At around 9 months my DS was up around 6.30, napped around 9.30-10, then 1-3pm. I'd do the first nap in the pushchair if I wanted to be out, and the second at home. Other than that, I'd go out in 1.5 hour bursts, but everything's local here too.

Definitely agree that it gets easier as they get older though. DS is now 13 months and only naps once in a day. He's very predictable in when he needs to sleep and we can get him to sleep at other people's houses, or in the pushchair.

hi Angel! How do you get your DS to nap when at other houses if not in pushchair? Have only tried if there's a cot and can stick in a dark room!

Iggly, well, I can't do it but DH can. He bounces him up and down in his arms till he's relaxed and 'singing', then sits down on a bed / chair and rocks him till he drops off. It's what DH does if he's doing a nap at home. I can't do it as my back isn't up to it (I use the rocking chair at home, but DH doesn't bother). Then he goes in the travel cot.

At the moment though, feeding to sleep often works as he's just this week dropped to one nap so he's usually a bit overtired by the time we get to it.

We'd need to use a separate room from where the action is, though, although he'll go to sleep with lots of people chatting in the next door room. We do tend to close the curtains, but he doesn't need it properly dark.

Do what works for you and your baby! DS won't have read the book! Enjoy your baby and don't worry about other peoples' schedules.

Get all your stuff ready when he's doing the morning nap and then as soon as he wakes up change nappy and out the door. Then at least you have til afternoon nap. That is if you want to stay at home for naps, you don't HAVE to you know, you might be lucky and have a baby who sleeps well in the buggy!

Thanks for all your help.

I started going out after the morning nap, but I am so disorganised these days it takes me a good 40 mins to get everything ready and out of the door! Need to get better at that. At the mo, I am sleeping when he is as night times are a lot of fun, so don't have that time to get organised, but that's only temporary (she hopes).

I manage to not get back in time for afternoon nap and end up having it really late, so need to be stricter with leaving. He is a nosey wee parker and if in someones house or buggy, everything is far too exciting. Even naps at home, I need to get a blackout blind as the little bits of light coming through the blind are exciting too!

He's never slept well during day TBH, but need to get better at them as he is a grizzly wee bear if I can't get him to nap. understandably!

Meeting up with other babies usually happens after 2.30/3ish as most would have finished their afternoon nap by then. If we go to a class my DD will normally catnap in the car/pram on the way and is usually so excited to be with other babies that she forgets she's tired til after the class!!