Table manners in 25 month old

[Rollercoasteryears]

At what point do people think you need to start insisting on a toddler eating with cutlery?

DS is 25 months and is very capable of using a fork and spoon to eat his food, but if anything, he actually seems to be doing so less and has reverted to using fingers for a lot of food. Not cereal etc, which he eats nicely with a spoon, but pasta (in sauce!), vegetables (one pea at a time!), potatoes etc all get picked up and eaten messily with fingers.

Other than gently encouraging him to use his spoon or fork like a big boy, I haven't pushed it as I want him to enjoy his meals more than anything but I wondered whether I should be insisting more and if I'm storing up problems for later?

Any thoughts on when it's reasonable to push the cutlery?

If he can use cutlery then I would encourage it, but I agree not to make too huge a deal out of it. It does help if you eat as a family. Also, I found it helpful to occasionally serve meals where I said it was OK to eat with your fingers - chops, burgers, chips, to make the distinction.

DS is 28mths old and does similar things to your DS. DP and I have discussed this and we agree that it's important to keep things light-hearted and to lead by example, gently reminding him at times. If he is being particularly messy we say 'Oh, DS, babies use their fingers, not big boys like you!' and that seems to work.

Sometimes he does soemthing that really annoy me and that is pushing his plate onto the floor when he has finished or doesn't want anymore and that earns him 2 minutes in time out straight away so he is learning and he does it less often now. I think the key is keeping things calm, being consistent and leading by example.

We have always adopted a hands off approach as he was BLW and for the most part he is competent and well-behaved but he is only 2 and as he approaches 3 we will be getting a bit stricter with the manners.

DS did that too a few months ago around the same age. I ignored it, didnt make a fuss,and carried on providing cutlery and making sure we ate at least some meals all together so he saw us using it, and just these last couple of weeks he has got all keen on the cutlery again. Think it may have been something to do with wanting to learn how to do it really well.