why doesn't he want to go to school ?

[mrsdavies85]

I have a 7yr old boy and have recently had a daughter who is nearly 8 weeks old. To start with we had the normal getting used to it behaviour but I had thought this had settled down.
Since gong back to school after the Christmas holidays, he has said he is unwell every morning and doesn't want to go to school, ( particuarly hard to ignore as he does has heart problems ). I send him and once ack home doesn't complain of beig unwell till the following morning.
I have spoken to him and he is telling me that everything in school is fine and he just wants to stay home. I'm worried he is being picked on or maybe its because I'm home all day with the new baby and he is a bit jealous. I'm feeling guilty at the moment am I showing him enough attention? especially as I am breastfeeding too. I have spoken to the school today who have said they are going to keep an eye on him.
Has anyone else had this problem and can offer me some advice :)

Sorry, no. We stopped at one. It does sound like jealousy/insecurity to me. I think he feels he is missing something if he isn't at home with you.
Can you plan a special treat for him at the weekend. Just the two of you?

Hi there

I'd say that he probably would benefit from some time with you on your own, if you can arrange it. Maybe go out for a little treat together, or a walk or something. If you can, try to find some special time together each day - that might also help.

To be honest, it can be a big adjustment for older children but he will adjust in his own time.

It sounds like you're doing all the right things in terms of talking to school about it.

I would also say that kids do go through phases of not wanting to go to school for all sorts of reasons, so spending some time together alone may give him the chance to talk to you about it, or may just give him the reassurance he needs.

t

His school has just rung me back and they assure me that he is very happy in school but they understand my concerns and will keep an extra eye on him. He had also told his teacher that " He wouldn't be in school tomorrow as he will be ill " so I have a feeling he is thinks he is missing out on something.I think I may have to invest in baby sling or something, so baby is happy but I have my hands free to do things with my son too !!