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should I encourage dd to form stronger female frienships.

2 replies

aslongassheishappy · 10/01/2011 13:32

dd is 4.10 and has just gone into second term of reception. she has 2 very close friends outside school but in school she does not play with the girls very often.

she has a male cousin in her class and spends all her time with him and another 2 or 3 boys. she tells me she does not like to play with the girls in her class because they dont play ben 10 and they dont like to play the games she likes even if she asks them to they dont want to play with her and vice versa. she also spends alot of time with children in year 4,5 and 6 and think she enjoys the attention from them and they are all very kind and sweet to her.

she appears happy at school and is learning well on track etc, but I just worry that she should try to form stronger friendships with the girls in her class and worry that if she does not in the early years of schools she may miss out on friendship in future years.

she also seems to have a very low tollerence of some of the other girls and what they are interested in she finds irksome and I try to discourage this alot, but she does not seem interested in friendship. she was very poular at nursery and had lots of friends who where all very like minded and had similar tremperaments. I dont know if im over worried about this.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
AMumInScotland · 10/01/2011 13:54

If she's happy with the friendships she's made, then I think you should leave her to it. I would only try to stop her saying/thinking "I don't like girls" or "I don't like the things girls like" - if instead she is thinking in terms of "I don't have much in common with these girls at the moment" it leaves her mind open to being more friendly with them as they get a bit older and maybe all like a broader range of things.

Children this age can be very focussed on what they like (eg Ben 10) and don't want to play with children who only like Barbie (or whatever it is 4yo girls like these days!) but that does ease off as they get a bit more mature, and she may make friends with girls later on.

spaceangel1382 · 11/01/2011 11:44

my best friends right the way through all my school life were boys. i just got on better with them than girls and still do. I have a few female friends now but lots of male friends. It never did me any harm, I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and have a 4 week old daughter. she will be fine, just as long as she is happy it wont matter what gender her friends are

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