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Kamikazee baby! Extreme babyproofing needed?

17 replies

fuzzypicklehead · 27/12/2010 23:46

My 14m stunt woman DD2 is making me tear my hair out! She's been walking and climbing for ages now, but I'm having trouble coping with some of her new tricks. She's attracted to everything she shouldn't have (which I would expect) like the phone/remote/baby monitor/laptop. But the steps I take to childproof are becoming increasingly less effective as she finds ways around them. She will drag and stack chairs and toys so that she can climb on them to reach worktops. Or climb on the toybox to try to remove a large painting from the wall. I think we have maybe a couple of weeks before she works out how to get over the safety gates by dragging chairs up to them. She also does daredevil tricks like climbing onto the arm of the sofa and doing flips onto the cushions. Or diving (literally) into her ball pool.

With the horrible weather, we've been stuck indoors a lot which means she's had to spend most of her time in the lounge to avoid her climbing into the washing machine or escaping out the dog flap, amongst other tricks. But even then I can't get anything done because I'm having to stop her climbing on to the fishtank or onto the back of the furniture. I know I need to watch her like a hawk, but I also have DD1(nearly 3) to occupy as well.

What can I do? Short of removing all of the furniture, I'm just not sure how to keep her safe. She's to young to understand the naughty step and if I say "no" she thinks it's funny. Anybody else have daredevil babies?

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Igglystuffedfullofturkey · 27/12/2010 23:54

Grin (sorry)

DS, similar age, is pretty crazy too. We let him climb on piles of cushions and low boxes to get it out of his system. We also have a few exciting toys to keep him occupied for a few seconds

I also try and involve him in chores like washing, cleaning etc so I can watch him. In fact I never leave him alone! But must be harder with two.

Also can you get her a puddle suit and take her out to a local park or in the garden? We've got one for DS so great for the wet and cold weather - he runs about on the snowy grass and is well protected.

fuzzypicklehead · 28/12/2010 00:35

The puddle suit is a good idea for both of them. I do try to let them burn off energy in their ball pit, tent & tunnel, and by bouncing on the air mattress. But outdoor exercise means they aren't making a mess indoors. Grin

I know some people use playpens, but I think mine would possibly use it as an excuse for cage fighting...

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maryz · 28/12/2010 00:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThingOne · 28/12/2010 01:06

My DS2 was crazy too. We bolted everything moveable to the walls. Our fire guard was held on by massive hooks either side. In the kitchen everything potentially dangerous was put out of reach. By that I mean either behind a really complicated childlock or so high I had to get on a step to use it.

Obviously he broke through every defence we erected but we did get some, brief, respite. We unplugged everything electrical (toaster, kettle, oven, microwave, washing machine) after every use until he was about four.

Some children are just very dedicated in their pursuit of chaos. Treat it as a challenge. And WIN!

ThingOne · 28/12/2010 01:09

Ha ha I've just read the post above mine (opened from active convos and thus cross posted).

My DS2 is still only four but never hurts himself doing dangerous gym or playground activities. I'm trusting in your theory maryz.

fuzzypicklehead · 28/12/2010 01:20

Ok, now I'm really scared! Shock

Maybe I'll just have to nail everything down and make her run off her energy for a few.. years or so!

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fuzzypicklehead · 28/12/2010 09:07

A-ha! Perhaps one of these and maybe some of these are what's needed. And some bubblewrap...

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maryz · 28/12/2010 10:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Igglystuffedfullofturkey · 28/12/2010 13:07

Grin kneepads!

I have used foam on the really sharp corners - DS had wacked his cheekbone in nasty falls so didn't want him to lose an eye. Also have stairgate - he has fallen down but doesn't stop him trying. Now we practise loads to get him used to them.

mariagoretti · 29/12/2010 00:04

Just do all the normal childproofing stuff. But much more thoroughly, to a much higher standard, and with a view to being frequently outwitted. Imagine she is a short but cunning and determined adult. But without the sense of danger.

Child stairgates usually are 80cm. Dog gates are 95cm. And you can buy extensions. Same with playpens; pet versions are bigger and sturdier. And remember a belt guard so she doesn't unclip the belt holding her car seat. Safety film your glass, remove all long cords, reduce cable length where possible, protect plugs and sockets, turn down your water thermostat, hide the bath plug. Don't use the oven, throw away or store most of the stuff you have, put anything safe(ish) but interesting where she can get it easily. Agree with maryz that learning to climb well might prove safer in the long run than trying to stop her.

Screw your pictures and mirrors to the walls. Also secure the bookcases, wardrobes, drawers etc in case she climbs them. Make sure you have circuit breakers on everything, proper fuses etc (get an electrician to give the place a once over if you must). Get locks for the dangerous cupboards. Leave plastic tat in at least one of the lower ones so she can rifle through it to her heart's content. Oh, and lock away your kitchen knives.

This lot hopefully will be unnecessary... but would give you peace of mind:
Buy a beeping bear child locator, so you can run in the right direction if she escapes your gaze for a few minutes. Leave the downstairs burglar alarm on overnight in case she sneaks down when you're sleeping. Consider magnetic locks for your doors and windows.

mariagoretti · 29/12/2010 00:07

My ds was kamikaze, and i only did half of this... he's fine but the effort of keeping him alive left me a lot more grey-haired than if I'd just accepted he was destined for the SAS!

HappySkiingGardeningNewYear · 29/12/2010 00:47

That's a good list mariagoretti. I've filed it away for a few mOnths time when DS is fully mobile.

I am very much of the opinion that they have to learn that some things hurt though, but it's a really difficult balance to strike without people thinking you are a very neglectful parent.

cece · 29/12/2010 00:55

DC3 climbed to the top of the older DCs TP climbing frame when he was about 14 months old. He fell off and winded himself. He now only goes one step high. I agree getting rid of much of the safety equipment. They need to learn it hurts! Obviously within reason...

Oh and always keep some change for the A%E car park... DC2 was a ngihtmare. He even manged to cut his head open in his sleep!

mariagoretti · 29/12/2010 01:15

Yes, safety gear is only to help prevent the life-threatening incidents but lit's very educational to have little accidents that won't leave permanent damage!

fuzzypicklehead · 29/12/2010 01:39

I think you've hit the nail on the head, mariagoretti, with "throw away or store most of the stuff you have". I think that combined with kicking the DIY childproofing up a notch is going to be my solution. I'm a little sad, as it means I'll kind of be living in a giant playroom for a while... But it's better than having a broken baby!

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DooinMeCleanin · 29/12/2010 01:46

Dd2 used to have a habit of stealing food from the fridge. I moved all the nice stuff higher up and kept just butter and marg etc on the bottom shelf.

When the cheese still had bite marks in it I blamed dd1 and thought it must have been her all along, until, one day dd2 did not see me in the kitchen doorway and I watched her stack the butter and marge into two little piles to stand on so she could reach the cheese Xmas Shock I couldn't decide whether to be angry at her for stealing food or proud that she had thought to do something so clever Xmas Grin

You have my sympathies. Dd2 was two when she learnt she could climb her baby gates.

fuzzypicklehead · 29/12/2010 22:22

That's hilarious! My DD2 would just save herself the effort and eat the butter.

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