Should I be worried about my 20 month old?

[Yarnie]

My husband and I are wondering whether our 20 month old might have some ASD/ADHD spectrum issues. Perhaps some of you mumsnetters with experience might have some comments for us?

Please excuse any ignorance on my part when discussing this. It's a new area for me.

I guess the most helpful thing would be to list the area of concern.

Poor sleeping
Limited eye contact
Social interactions not enjoyed
Slightly slow fine motor control
Some impulse control issues (which toddler doesn't!)
Does not usually respond to name
Slightly behind his peers verbally
Short attention span

Gosh there may be others! That's all I can think of right now.

We're having a bit of a tough time and wondering whether we should be looking into specific techniques to improve everyone's day to day life.

I'm finding his vehement dislike of interacting socially very challenging at the moment. It's quite isolating and depressing.

Any thoughts?

Thanks, everyone.

Does he point at things he is interested in and does he wave?

I went through a similar phase with DS2, who's now 27 months and is a lot more socialable. Go and see your gp or health visitor and they should refer you to the paediatrician. None of your concerns automatically mean he had any issues, but without seeing a child it's impossible to tell.

Ask to be sent for a hearing test too...glue ear is another explanation for many of the behaviors you are concerned about and it's very common in children of that age. Depending how far behind his speech is you might also want to push for a speech and language referal.

Don't sit on your hands, go see the people who can help you, if he does have ASD early intervention is really important and it can take time to get appointments. Try not to worry too much about him, and don't start googling asd!

Hi sock. Yes, he does point at things he is interested in. He can wave and does sometimes, but I think his social issues mean that he is not usually minded to wave at people.

We will see our GP, it's nice to test the waters here. It's a new area to us and we have no idea whether we are just neurotic or there is something behind it. It's nice to get a sense of what is normal. Our toddler social circle is quite small and our son is definitely behind his friends, but we don't know whether that's significant.

We'll find out, I guess.

Not pointing and waving are ASD 'red flags' so that's a good thing. You could have a quick look online for the CHAT test, which I suspect may put your mind at ease from what you have said. Bear in mind that all children display autistic traits at his age, he will probably grow out of most of it.

Definatly do go to the GP though for a hearing test as he could have glue ear...it would explain the few words, not responding and short attention span at the very least.
He could of course just be doing everything in his own sweet time in order to cause maximum parental stress!

That's really helpful, thanks. We'll definitely get his hearing tested, too. I didn't think of that (I've been more concerned about his social troubles). He has quite a lot of words that we understand (but no one else could possibly), maybe 40 or so. I know toddlers' pronunciation develops at different rates, but it might a/c for his verbal idiosyncrasies. Or he may have just not quite got the hang of it yet!