Separation anxiety

[Mads1]

I know that according to most text books s.a. begins at around 8 months but has anyone ever experienced this earlier?

What are the signs? My DD is 5.5 months old and a couple of times has looked at me when being held by someone and starts to cry. She isn't really a "cry baby". She's quite content. Is this the calm before the storm!!

dd started at 5 months. It got worse for a long while before it improved gradually from about 2 -sorry.

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Hi
A friend has recently lent me a book called "Baby & Child" by Penelope Leach.
The section on separation anxiety basically says that you are the centre of your baby's world who helps her cope with everything. Usually it is not the strangers who distress your baby, but what they do. The book asks how would you feel if a stranger ran up to you in the street and started hugging and kissing you? We would like to know the person before that sort of contact, and it is no different for the baby.
It advises to employ tactics such as enabling your baby to play peek-a-boo with visitors, or peep over your shoulder at people going about their business, and let the child go towards the "stranger" voluntarily, once some of the shyness has evaporated. If you let the child make the social running now, he/she will grow into a confident toddler - apparently.

I have only dipped in and out of the book, but it is very interesting, and my child-minder swears by it. ISBN: 0-14-046393-3
Might put your mind at rest?

Some very good tips!! Thank you.
Lizs - thank you for the warning!!!

What are the signs? just basically crying when with some one else and then sees you? She has also done this with relatives who see her often!

Penelope Leach adds that the child needs to get your full measure before he/she can feel confident about others. There is a lot to read and digest, and I cannot do it justice unfortunately.
I think what she is saying is that you are your baby's other half - you complete her, and she is at a loss when you are not near - at this time in her life, no-one else is up to par, and they just will not do!
My ds is a week short of nine months, and we started experiencing this a few weeks ago. He has just started crawling and I think this will help ease the situation, as he will not feel quite so helpless/left stranded - he can come to me, even if it does take all morning!
He has only just got used to our childminder, a few months on - he only goes for 3 hours once a week, but now he is a happy little thing when he is there.
We can think things through and rationalize them, but a baby cannot - they just feel helpless, abandoned and at the mercy of a person who doesn't look or smell like mummy.
Perhaps it's a bit like driving your old, familiar car and then stepping into a double decker bus, attempting to take that for a spin - I'd lose control.
Ah, I'm just babbling now.
Your baby loves you unconditionally and wants to be with you - it's a compliment. Your DD is content - so you're obviously doing motherhood right!

my dd never had the seperation anxiety thing, she flaps her arms with pleasure as I wheel her up to the nursery door because the girls who look after her are brilliant (she started at 9 mths) she loves them because they love her. I feel proud and because she will be an only child I am happy she is becoming sociable.

I never experienced it with my DD - very confident - it's like living with an another adult sometimes!
My DS, however, is a different kettle of fish, and yet, we think we treated both the same - it must be a personality thing.

Mads1,

If I'm interpreting the signs correctly, then my daughter has separation anxiety even though she has just turned seven months, and has done for at least a few weeks.

She has always been very sociable and smiley, but for over a month now she has become more fussy about who she is handed to; often after having observed them from the safety of my arms she is then happy to go to them. She has started crying when visitors come to our house. Again, she gets used to them after ten minutes or so. Most recently, often when alone with her father she will be fine, but if I then come into the room she will want me. She gets distressed if I then leave the room. Is that separation anxiety?!

there is stranger anxiety and also seperation anxiety but they are both part of the same developmental stage. stranger anxiety and seperation anxiety

For the last 3 months my baby will not go to anyone else apart from me or my husband. She is 7 months and there does not seem to be any improvemnt. What can I do to make it better?

My DS was fine on starting nursery (at 8 months) and loved the carers there, but has now moved up to the next room and is showing signs of what seems to be separation anxiety - crying when I leave him in the morning. Not sure if I can really implement any of the Penelope Leach stuff because he just starts to cry when we enter the room! Am hoping it will wear off but at a bit of a loss in the meantime.

For the last week my 2.5 year old son seems to be suffering from seperation anxiety suddenly and particularly at night time. We used to read a story then leave him looking at his books until he was ready to snuggle down and just went to sleep. He now screams as soon as we get off the bed to leave and I have had to stay with him until he goes to sleep. We told him 2 weeks ago that a new baby was on the way but he seems pleased by that and often talks and pats my tummy. We have no idea where this has come from. Last night I did leave him to cry but went in a couple of times adn in the end had to stay 2 mins till he fell asleep. We have just been to friends for 4 nights and it took 2 hours sometimes for him to sleep??? Any advice welcome.