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Help needed. 2 year old started pushing and hitting

3 replies

nappyvalley39 · 25/11/2010 12:58

My 2 year old DD has just started pushing, shoving, hitting and hair pulling when we go to play groups or other people's houses where she generally does not know any of the children who are roughly the same age.

I have also got a 5 year old boy who she has had to stand her ground with at home. Albeit refereed by me.

Initially he would do the above behaviour with her when she was about one when she would invade his space, play with his toys, want to play with him, but he has now learnt to "share" and does not display that behaviour anymore or retaliate when she does above behviour on him.

She has just turned 2, so naughty step feels a little bit early and I'm not sure how much she understands when I tell her off. It feels like really raw emotions that she has not had to deal with before. I know it is a phase and won't resolve itself over night. However, I am keen to nip this behaviour in the bud. So far, I have tried saying no to her when she does it and why, taking her out of the situation, making a fuss of the other child who is usually crying at this point to see if it is about attention. However, she continues to behave as above even after I have done some sort of discipline.

5 year old DS started school in september so now DD is going to age appropriate activities where as before she generally went where her older brother went.

Finding going to playgroups very stressfull at the moment. Don't know whether to avoid or perservere as problem may be lack of socialisation with her own age group up until recently.

Top tips on how to improove this behaviour. What is going through the mind of a 2 year old and what this behaviour is all about anyway.

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whomovedmychocolate · 25/11/2010 13:17

Remove her from the situation with a firm 'no'.

Immediately when you see her say 'no', pick her up under the arms and take her out of the room, plonk her on the floor and say 'we do not hit'.

Do it consistently and she will learn it's not a good thing to do. :)

nappyvalley39 · 25/11/2010 13:39

Thanks for this. Should I leave her in the other room for a short period of time to reinforce the message or after saying "we do not hit" is that the end of the discipline and then take her back into the situation. Should I keep doing it if she repeat offends or should I up the message by leaving the playgroup after x number of repeat offences.

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whomovedmychocolate · 25/11/2010 14:37

The message is the end of it. Just keep doing it - if she keeps on going back and hitting say 'we are leaving because you are hitting - we do not hit'. Also make a MASSIVE fuss of the child who has been hit.

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