3 year old wipe own bottom?

[PrinceCorum]

So our day care nursery surprised me today by saying they often leave my 3 year old on his own in the toilet and have no idea if he has done a poo or not. The implication is that they kind of expect him to do it and then clean himself up unsupervised. This is a surprise to me, as at home we always clean him up, although I am trying to explain to him how to use loo paper, etc. But he still gets more messy than he is capable of cleaning up on his own.

and this is a nursery that has just got an "Oustanding" verdict from OFSTED.

What do you think? Should a nursery just leave 3 year olds to fend for themselves in the loo? Can your 3 year old?

No way my 3 year old would wipe his own bum ! It just wouldn't occur to him... flags are out if he manages to get to the loo ! Sounds a bit odd - our nursery certainly wouldn't let them do that - hygienically it's a nightmare surely - at the very least they could be pulling up their pants and running about dirty all day ?

i had exactly the same problem with my DS, I was told that they are allowed to wipe his bum but they have to be invited into the loo with him otherwise they are invading his personal space or some such crap.

I have only just in the last couple of months persuaded my 6-yo to wipe her own bottom after a poo. I know that is ridiculous though.

But I think 3 is too young to have a total lack of supervision, shouldn't they at least be checking he has washed his hands?

I was still wiping my DDs bum at 9!

I wouldn't expect Nursery staff to wipe a 3 yo old's bottom tbh. DD learnt to wipe as part of potty training but obviously all children are different.

Perhaps to ask "have you wiped your bottom?" and if not to go back and do so - they are surely capable at 3 to understand.

at my dd (3) playgroup they do not wipe her bum she does it.she also does it herself at home as well.

dd2 is 3 and her nursery don't wipe her bottom. She can mostly do it herself but has the odd occasion of messiness.

Interesting !

So some are surprised by this and some say their three year olds can do it already.

To gemmummy - my nursery gave me that exact same argument - they don't want to stand over the child or invade their space while doing a number two as it might doscourage the child from going to the loo.

What irritated me is that when I talked to my son about this issue, he said he had done a poo and wiped himself up - interesting, I thought, but then I said - "and you washed your hands" and he said "no" - doh! I feel so sorry for him (and the others).

I can't help feeling that the nursery should at least make sure the child is OK and knows what they are doing. It's not like we haven't potty trained our child and just expected the nursery to do it - not at all. But a bit of care and consideration wouldn't go a miss - hell, the nursery fees are extortionate enough !

DS1 is nearly four, and can wipe his own bottom, but if I don't check after him he invariably ends up with skid marks on his underpants.

At his nursery they let them go by themselves to the loo, and wipe their own bottoms, but DS1 seems to have got the knack of not doing a poo there, and saving it all for when he gets home, so it's not an issue.

But I would rather someone went in after him and checked that he had wiped himself properly, and washed his hands.

DS1 is 4.5 and can do it, but asks me to check. He'd also rather me or dh do it at home.

I suppose it depends on child. I'd personally not leave a 3 yr old to it for hygiene reasons. I'd want to help them wash hands thoroughly also.

My dd who is only jjust 4 wipes on her own at nursery and from what I gather all in her group do. They are all trained well in handwashing and am pleased she can do this independently if she needs to. At home there are normally yells of "MUMMY" as loud as she can shout for assistance with wiping if she's had a poo.