Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Help - 7mo separation/stranger anxiety - am I making it worse???

6 replies

LuckyC · 18/11/2010 17:09

My 7mo is easily upset by crowds, strangers, other adults, even people she knows quite well (like my friends she has known since birth.) She will cry if we go into a loud, crowded room; will sometimes cry if someone stops and coos over her while she is in pram or sling; cries if I give her to anyone to hold.

Sunny happy smiley baby rest of the time. Brilliant fun. We don't have family nearby and she has never been looked after by anyone but me and dad.

So, I have been trying to build her confidence. We go to baby group or similar every day so she sees lots of people. I also have been passing her to people she knows very well for a cuddle - she generally cries, then I take her back.

However, I have had new advice that said don't hand her to people - makes it worse, as heightens her stress and she can see I am anxious about it, too, so bad feedback loop.

Now what? And how will I ever have a babysitter??

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
piscesmoon · 18/11/2010 17:40

It is just a phase! You can hand a newborn baby to anyone but around 6 months they don't like it. The next phase is to be OK with people they know. Don't worry.

LuckyC · 19/11/2010 21:31

Thanks, Pisces. It's awful that she's so anxious and upset around people.

OP posts:
tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 19/11/2010 22:01

Ds2 cries when I leave the room, when I put him down! Getting dressed is run.....NOT and Ds1 is not happy about it either!! Just a phase Lucky......I hope!!

Octaviapink · 20/11/2010 10:52

I'd be inclined to go with what she's comfortable with for now, rather than trying to acclimatise her - she will become more confident!

Scootergrrrl · 20/11/2010 11:00

Perhaps you could encourage people to interact with her while she's sitting on your knee facing outwards so she has that bit of security. My ds, who's also seven months, is not keen on being handed over to strangers but will happily grin at people from the safety of my lap! They do grow out of it though so don't worry!

snowmummy · 20/11/2010 19:43

My dd had stranger and separation anxiety really badly for a few months. She would be picked up by no one except me or dh without having a massive meltdown. I couldn't even leave her alone for a minute whilst I went to the loo. It was wearing but I just went with it for the few months, carried her with me everywhere I could and just accepted she didn't want to be held by other people. It upset the grandparents but they got over it!

Anyway, she is now a very happy, confident and socialable 3 and a half year old.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page