PLEASE HELP bevaiour at nursery

[shobbs]

im after a little advice my son is 3years 10 months and very smart for his age, hes very aware of his surroundings and has a very active mind (always wanting to know why things happen and what for)

the problem i have is with nursery and when were out in a large(ish) group of people.

in our home its usually just me and him (dad works away in the army), at home he is an absolute angel does as hes told etc etc,

he sleeps fpr around 12/13hrs a night with no problem going to bed, but my issue is that when we are out or at nursery he gets very excited around others, can throw things and generally get very excited when were out etc etc.

nursery are trying to address his issues through feeling cards, which they say he starting to listen.

when i tell my son its nursery time he says its "boring" which i find a little sad at home he loves to be kept occupied either by workbooks or "being a big boy" and helping me out.

im really looking for advice as to what i can do to help with his sheer excitement, and behaviour when im not around..

please any advice will be very appreciated

well im at uni full time in my final year he goes 3 days a week from 9 till 3.30

i was thinking this as hes so used to being with me on my own,

nursery have said that he is very bright for his age and as the 'government guidlines' they cant do any work based activities with him, apart of me is feeling that maybe hes not being challanged enough and thats whats affecting his behaviour at nursery, what do u think?

What are the nursery like? I've always found the opposite with mine actually- they are well-behaved in nursery/ school then horrors when they come home, must be all the strain of being good while they are there!

Does the nursery do a lot of structured activities with them, or is it mainly play? Reason I ask, all of mine went to a nursery then a different pre-school nursery when they were 3 (ds has just started- sob!) I found by the time they were leaving their "baby" nursery they were getting a bit bored, but their pre-school seems to have a very organised timetable of activities and work that keeps them better occupied/ more stimulated. Maybe if your nursery is "boring" him, could you look at an alternative nursery that might engage him better??

x-posts! Does sound like he is ready to learn more/ be challenged. Our nursery do a lot of "work" based activities with them from 3yrs on, and my lot all really thrived on it.

well hes in a class of 24 children and only 5 are preschool age, the rest are aged between 2 and 3. i have tried looking around for preschools but to be honest i dont know where i would start.

IME word of mouth is the best place to start- anyone you know with a child at another pre-school? One of my friends moved her ds to our nursery for this exact reason and it really worked out.

Don't get me wrong, I am very relaxed about education in their younger years (I'm not a pushy parent, honestly!!) but I found the more structured "work" based environment seemed to interest them more, and they made the transition to school really smoothly, so possibly worth investigating further. I take he is getting funding now? ask your local council about pre-school nurseries and go visit (easy to say, I know, but does take time!)

his nursery fees are all out of my loans, as funding cannot be given as my partners income, i just be-grudge paying for the nursery if hes not enjoying it

Don't understand why funding depends on your partner's income- not sure if it is a SCottish thing, but here ALL children are entitled to 5 free sessions a week at the age of 3. Admittedly the sessions are only 2 1/2 hours, but our nursery is in the partnership scheme, so the funding goes to the nursery and we pay the top-up. Maybe worth a call to your local council?? It could be that your nursery is private and not in the scheme??

the nursery is private, its the only one in the area , so i guess they charge extra (typical) i pay for 3x session 8 -1 at £34 a session

Are you in the UK? If so you should be eligible for a free place in a nursery class at school. These are usually half days (in our school it was 9-11.30 or 12.30-3 so I didn't use it as my DD was at full-time day nursery while I was at work) but you could maybe mix it up with a bit of paid-for childminder and a bit of free nursery class?

Alternatively, DD's nursery was a Montessori and they actually did quite a bit of number/letter/reading stuff. It's geared to the child learning at their own pace so while DD could write her name but not really read when she left to go to school, one of her classmates was already reading books.

Ouch!! The fact it is the only one in the area does make it more difficult Our nursery only charges £15 for a half day (8.15-1pm) and £29 for the full day! It IS private, but I get funding too! Didn't realise how lucky I was!

as I said, ds has just started, but my 2 dds went there too, and I was really impressed at the scope of things they do- each week they have a theme, often suggested by the children, like space, dinosaurs, sea-life etc, and they link it in to books, pictures, crafts, games..I have a box in a cupboard groaning with all their "work"! Whereas at ds's old nursery, although the nursery nurses were lovely, it seemed they just stuck some stuff out on the tables and let them wander around- I often found him wandering about aimlessly when I went to collect him

yes in uk, honestly i have no idea about funding, thats how much they communicate, when he began the nursery back in october last year he loved it was only a small group, use to take the children for walks as we are based in a little village and cook with them ( which he loved) but as the nursery has grown there activities have been based around messy play, role play and outside play and like you said jooly they just seem to stick it on a table and let them play if they want. are preschools just preschools or are the also associated with playgroups (just trying to research online now)

It does sound like he has kinda outgrown the nursery now. Pre-schools can be under nurseries, but many are actually attached to schools, which can make school transition even easier as they already know a lot of the other children and even the teachers, and their "curriculum" is geared up to prepare them for P1. I would speak to your local council- most councils have at least one council-run preschool nursery. And you SHOULD be getting funding of some sort, which would no doubt be a godsend!

yes definately. im definately going to pay them a visit tom thank you for your help. really has put my mind at rest

Hope you get it sorted! If it works out your ds will be happier and you may be better off

I only know about England, but if there's a primary school in your village with a nursery class, there should be provision there for your DS - at present there is free nursery education (either delivered through half days at school or the kind of funding jooly is talking about) for 3 and 4 year olds. I know in the Budget before the election there was talk of extending this to 2 year olds from less well off families, but I don't know what the effect of the change in government has been on this. (These days I'm more worried about secondary school!)