Tell me nursery drop-offs get easier!

[TheBreastmilksOnMe]

My 2yr old DS has just started nursery this week and it broke my heart to hear him crying and calling out my name when I left him. I stood in the porch, where he couldn't see me and cried as I couldn't bare to walk out when he was so upset. He was shouting my name in a voice I havn't heard before and shouting 'No' to everything the assisstant was asking him. After about 5 mins he did stop crying and I was able to leave.

The thing is, I am a CMer and I know this! It's just so hard when it's your own child. I feel like I am causing him some emotional damage or something. It's silly because my head is saying one thing and my heart another. I don't have any problem with the school, it's just that he is so young and he has never stayed with anyone apart from family before.

Please tell me it gets easier! I'm dreading the next time he is there!

You KNOW it gets easier! I had a dreadful time with DD2, who was much older than DD1 when she started nursery. DD1 started when she was 6 months and didn't really need a settling in period, but DD2 took a good couple of weeks. 10 months down the line and she runs into the arms of her keyworker three mornings a week (which actually makes me feel worse than when she cries!)

It does ease as they get used to it. First week is the worst I promise!

It will get better-I remember posting on here when ds started nursery and everyone said the same to me. He'd cry,I'd leave and sit sobbing in the car and dread the next time he had to go. However,after about 4 weeks (he was only going 2 mornings a week) he was fine. He now runs in happily and really enjoys nursery-last week he cried when I went to collect him as he wanted to stay at nursery for lunch! Keep going,it gets easier and you'll be glad you perservered

It does get better, but in our case quite slowly. My DD1 started in Sept, two mornings a week when she was 2.5. The first couple of weeks were horrendous, but v. slowly the major hysteria stopped and it was just sniffles. She is still unhappy the mornings she knows it is nursery - says stuff like 'No go to nursery today', but when she gets there she finds one of the helpers she likes and runs to her. I am still not convinced she gets much out of it, she doesn't seem to mix with the other children (maybe too young) and when I go and pick her up she is always looking a bit bored. She is such a lovely bubbly, chatty little thing at home and always into everything so I find this hard and it upsets me that she isn't showing anyone else how sweet she is ! It is still early days though and now the trauma and tears phase have passed it can only get better. I bought her a book about going to nursery that I think helped and talked to her about it throughout the week so she knew it was coming up and then I could remind of pictures in the book and things we had talked about. Hang on in there :)

My dd now (2.10) has been in nursery f/t for 2 years now. The first week was hell and I broke my heart over it, despite, like you, knowing that this is quite the norm. I cried in front of the staff when dropping off and collecting her and she went on a total hunger strike, refusing to eat, as well as crying loads. The second week, she was loving it. Total seachange, seemingly overnight! We've never looked back. It will get better.

Thankyou for your lovely words of wisdom I am starting to feel a lot better about it now. Podster that book you mentioned- what was it called? I'm sure DS would relate to something like that. I'll toughen up for the next few weeks, seeing as he's only going for 2 days also I'm anticipating it will take him longer to settle.

The other thing to consider is how they are once they calm down. My dd is 2.8 and has been going to the same nursery for a day a week since she was 6 months old. She has rarely NOT cried when I've dropped her off but I know that from about 5 mins after she got there til I pick her up she has a fantastic time! I think she's just one of those kids who's always going to cry! I don't like that she cries but that's more about me. As long as I know she's happy there (and I totally know she is) I have no qualms about leaving her.

Ds (1) on the other hand smiles and reaches out for the nursery staff as soon as we get there.

Its awful isnt it

I sat in the car crying

Then ds did nursery mon-thurs crying at drop off and pick up, i had the fri off so he stayed home with me. He cried because he missed nursery

A month later and he loves nursery and does not cry at drop off. He does cry a tiny bit at pick up but with a huge grin, so its obv just a habit