Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

toddler behaviour at nursery

8 replies

shobbs · 25/10/2010 22:22

my 3yr 10month old son has been going to nurseries since he was 8 months old,

hes been going to his current nursery for nearly 9months for 3 mornings a week.

ever so often he has a bad few days (like most of us) but every time i pick him up from nursery i am handed with a incident report about his bevaiour.

for example, he was outside playing and he threw a roller (small childs paint brush) not intential, just threw through sheer excitement and it caught a child in the arm.

my son is VERY polite and said sorry straight away, another incident was playing in a sand pit and a child told the nursery worker that my son hit her on a knee with a spade, there was a slight mark but again not intentional, and again very sympathetic

he is an only child and at home is an absolute angle, makes his bed in the morning, takes his plates out, goes to bed without a fuss every night sleeping for a 12full hours.

he is a typical boy loves cars, the rough and tumble etc etc, but feel that his nursery is making too much of a fuss over his behaviour at nursery he is in a mix toddler and preschool and very bright for his age.

i hate the drive to nursery as i dread to think whats he been like,

also my son is aware of nursery picking up on his behaviour as every time we leave he says "mummy have i been good today"

he is a very hands on little boy loves being given tasks that make him feel like a big boy " you dont think you can be a big boy and help me move ....." he jumps to the task,

he can also get very excited around other people that he doesnt know very well this always reminds me of a lion putting a mark on his territory

please help

is his nursery over-reacting?
any advice would be very welcome

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
RidgewayLass · 25/10/2010 22:28

Yes they are overreacting. Ask them do they think these are normal toddler behaviours? If so, then why do you think I need to know? Is there something you think I need to do about it?

pigletmania · 26/10/2010 00:37

Yes they are totally overreacting, what do they expect children to be like little robots. These things will happen its part and parcel of pre school behaviour. Why not talk to them about your concerns, and that this is impacting negatively on your child. Wish my 3.7 year old dd was like your son, she is just so whiny and tantrumy ahhhghhh when will this end.

seeker · 26/10/2010 00:39

Don't want to be a negative voice - but how do you know these things are unintentional?

shobbs · 26/10/2010 08:41

the nursery have said it its from sheer excitement as they have been observing him before hand, i dont know what to think if this is normal or not. everyone gets there off days and feel that now my son knows what nursery are picking him up on, and he's acting on it.

i was thinking of maybe giving nursery a sticker chart to focus on positive behaviour for my son???

seeker - thanks for comment i dont fully no that it is unintentional but whats been said from nursery there are saying it is, just through sheer excitement

OP posts:
HumphreyCobbler · 26/10/2010 08:44

I would want to stop the comments at drop off, especially if your son can hear - "Have I been good today?" This is sad to hear.

If the nursery themselves say it is behavior due to excitability then they should be handling it differently IMO.

shongololo · 26/10/2010 08:50

ask the nursery how their constant referrals to bad behavior are affecting the self esteem of the child. Telling tales about normal behavior, without offering an effective positive strategy, is just not on.

However, you should also be prepared to hear things about your little angel, as a lone child at home can be a complete brat in another setting because he/she cannot dominate all the adult attention.

shobbs · 26/10/2010 10:28

oh im definateley open to comments regarding my son, i no every child is good as well as bad, just looking for advice to tackle this behaviour and ideas on ways to move forward,

trust me ive been through different challanges regarding my son i.e sleeping, teething, throwing, etc etc the general issues with having a child, all with hard word and determination bit this issue is a different and challanging one and need help!!

OP posts:
bendybanana · 26/10/2010 14:03

he sounds quite normal really but the staff should know how to deal with it. I'd be interested in what happened b4 hand and why he did it. What is the root to his actions? It might be just him learning to share or maybe the staff are missing other childrens provocative behaviour?

Instead of asking if he has been good can you ask if he has had a nice day or what he has been up to? Make it positive. If the staff raise an issue don't berate him but quietly and nicely ask him his opinion of what happened. Why it happened.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page