Constantly clingy 3 year old

[BornToFolk]

DS is just 3 and has always been clingy, especially with me. He had separation anxiety as a baby and used to cry when I left the room. He got a bit better but has never been great at playing by himself.
Now, he won't play by himself at all. Ever.

If I leave the room he runs after me saying "mummy, mummy, mummy". He wants to "help" with everything. If I try and set him up with a toy or some colouring in one room while I do something else, he'll just refuse to do it and follow me.

I let him help with as much as possible but sometimes I just need to get things done. It particularly drives me mad in the mornings when I'm going from room to room picking things up, locking doors etc and he's always just one step behind me. I've asked him to wait by the front door, but he just won't. He hates me being out of sight.

He goes to nursery 3 days a week and is fine there. He had a recent wobble about being left in the mornings but is OK again now...gives me a kiss and a cuddle and goes off quite happily.

It's starting to drive me mad! All I ever hear is "you play with me?" or "can I help?"

Are all three year olds like this? I was really hoping he'd be getting more independant by now but he's getting worse!

Hi
I know exactly how u feel. My little girl is 2 next month and shes just like this. She grabs my hand all the time and says "come mummy". I cant even go to the toilet without her crying at bottom of stairs cos I've closed the gate. She wont play alone or with any other children. She goes to nursery and is fine there but when she knows I'm around she must be by my side or one step behind!
I was hoping she'd grow out of it, but from your story I'm guessing she wont!

Mine has been like this and I've tried to spend more time with her in the hope she will feel more confident. I think it might be working a bit maybe??

Thanks, it's good to know I'm not alone!

I think I'm starting to get worried that I've done something wrong with him. He's a cautious little fella. He's never been one to run off, ever. He wants to hold my hand all the time when we are out and about, which is great in some ways obviously but the excess of caution worries me.

I'm trying not to be a helicoptor parent but it's hard not to be when he's there all the time and won't try anything for himself! My new tactic is to tell him that I'll help him with something if he's had a go first and can't do it.

Not sure whether it's his personality, a phase (bloody long one though!), or whether I've messed him up by giving him too much/not enough attention when he was younger.

You're not alone - my dd(3) always wants to hold my hand (even still at playgroup) and is very clingy and cautious too. She tells other children to be careful if they're climbing on something! It worries me too and I'm making a conscious effort not to say 'be careful' to her now as i think we must have been a bit overcautious with her! I do think its also just some childrens natural personality though, just like some are real bolters, regardless of how they've been parented. One of my nephews is very cautious but his brother has no fear of anything.