Ds is 3y9m and keeps wetting himself all of a sudden

[TheUnmentioned]

Im not sure whether to put this in this section or in general health.

Ds has been out of nappies for about 13 months, he has rarely had wee accidents (except at nursery but that was ok, it was because he was/is shy and scared to ask to go). However, the last 2 days he has repeatedly wet himself and he doesnt even tell us when he's done it. Funnily enough he had started to go for a pee at nursery but did have accidents there again last week but not to worried about that.

He doesnt have a temperature but does have a cold.

He has just got a new baby sister 3 weeks ago.

Would you ask the GP to send a sample off during the week?

Would you be worried about him emotionally? I am scared I have done the whole new baby thing all wrong and messed his head up but up until the last 2 days he has been doing brilliantly with it all. The only thing thats changed is that dh went back to work on Thu but has been off the last 2 days anyways.

Help! I have asked him why he is doing it he just gets upset or ignores me so Im not pushing it.

Oh, he did have 2 UTIs when he was about 22m.

Some kind of regression after the arrival of new sibling is absolutely normal and no sign that you have done anything wrong. It's a big change in anybody's life and he needs time to adjust. Particularly if he is also under the weather with a cold.

Yes, you can take him to the GP to rule out a UTI. But it's more or less what I would expect anyway.

Thanks cory, I just feel like he must be really sad if he's doing this, I dont think its a conscious decision iyswim? He seems pretty happy (apart from a few tantrums which are to be expected), we've been out to the aquarium this morning and he's had lots of cuddles etc...

I really think you should stop worrying about how sad he must be: he is adjusting to a major change in his life, he will be fine once he has adjusted. tbh a life without challenges wouldn't be much of a life, would it? Besides, ime it doesn't take that much to make a 3yo start wetting: it's not a massive big thing, like it would be with a 10yo. Carry on with the cuddles and be prepared to do a bit of mopping.

THANKS Cory, I know its just so hard to feel guilty about eveything isnt it? Also, the last 4 weeks have been tough going with quite a bit of uncertainty and trips to hospital for me and the baby etc. No wonder he's unsettled, poor wee thing.

Aw you poor thing - and I mean you, not the 3yo. You must be knackered.

fwiw I found this an absolutely exhausting time of my life. Dd, who was also 3, didn't start wetting when baby brother was born, but she did try to pull his arms off or throw things at his head while I was breastfeeding. In between, she was very excited and fond of him: it just got a bit much.

She settled down eventually. But it was very tiring.

SO lots of sympathy!

thanks yeah definitely knackered and to top it off we all, includng the baby have a horrible cold....argh!!

thanks so much for replies, made all the difference

Bumping as wondering if anyone had any advice as to how to deal with this?

My mum says it is highly unusual and he must be 'really worried' about something - thanks Mum!

Highly unusual- nonsense! Several children of my toddler group had periods of later wetting for no obvious reason at all. At least a couple of my nephews were not reliably dry at 4 though they had been potty trained over a year previously. Most children I know have gone through some kind of regressive behaviour with the arrival of baby siblings.

Your mother either has very limited experience or is suffering from selective memory: a complaint that seems to hit most parents once their own offspring start junior school!

(if I had 50 p for every time my mother went "oh, but none of you ever did anything like that"- whilst I am sitting there thinking "mother, I clearly remember doing this very thing" [grr])

You are taking this to heart because you are exhausted and your mother is not helping. But really, you won't get a doctor to take wetting seriously before the child is about 6 or 7- because before that it is considered normal.

SO carry on with what you are doing, cuddling, reassuring, don't let him see that the wetting upsets you, but just clear up briskly.

Thanks again Cory!

I dont know if he's doing it deliberately now because he stood up today and smiled and said oh dear not again Ive wet myself