Why does my 6.5yo DD1 dislike praise/compliments?

[franch]

Not that I want her to become a praise junkie or anything, but nor do I want her to be one of those girls who, when they receive 99 positive comments and 1 negative one, it's only the latter that they hear.

Examples: when I told her that her class teacher had described her as 'incredible', she immediately changed the subject and talked about another girl, saying ' Sarah's incredible - she knows all her times tables up to 100!'

We were talking about friendships and I suggested that other girls like her because she takes such an interest in them and she's very kind. She squirmed and said 'Stop talking about that!'

Often if we praise her for something (kindness, ability, whatever), she'll say ' Everyone's mum/dad thinks their child is the best' - extraordinary cynicism for a 6yo, I think?

She's an extremely bright, strikingly beautiful and touchingly kind girl, but I do worry about her confidence at times.

Any insights?

My DS2 is oblivious rather than obvious. Hops you got that.

BR - also food for thought, my two boys sound like your two !

Definite point there, Brideshead, about the emphasis being on their reaction. Ds is very suspicious of any turn of phrase that sounds as if I have read the child handling manuals- because he knows that then I am focusing on getting a certain reaction out of him. So anything out of Alfie Kohn/American self help books/virtually any guru you like gets his hackles right up.
I'm a bit like that myself: when somebody says to me "I hear what you are saying, Mrs Cory", I know they are just making the right noises to get the reaction they want: they've got it out of a bloody book!

Yes, I think these phrases from books sound so insincere, and children can sense insincerity I think

Yeah, I think they can tell when you are faking: I did the "How to Talk" trick on DS at one point when he was persistently being awkard about bedtimes. It worked . The next night however, I tried again, and he replied, "Oh mum don't start all that silly nonsense, I know you got it out of a book"

I feel you should praise him for trying hard (difficult in DS case, because he is very lazy laid-back), and for good behaviour, rather than just "BEING" clever, or "BEING" nice.