4yo gets so excited. Practical ways to help her calm down?

[YunoYurbubson]

Typical example: Her friends came over today and brought their older sisters with them. Older sisters are 13yo. Dd WORSHIPS these Big Girls. She was so excited and shy and desparate to impress them that she was a complete plain in the arse, and I heard one of the girls asking their mum to PLEASE get dd to leave her alone.

She gets so silly and giggly and pulls clothes and doesn't stop when people say "Dd, please STOP doing that, it is not fun or funny".

These Big Girls are lovely girls and very happy to play with the little ones. They spend a lot of time with one of dd's classmates because she is a nice, sweet child who doesn't leap all over them and spoil the game.

This is just one example of many. We have the same every Friday when her Father comes home for the weekend and it takes an awful lot careful steering not to end up with someone getting cross within 15 minutes of him walking in the door. She can't stop giggling and has torn his clothes in her excited clambering all over him.

She needs a better way of managing her excitement. I need to be able to help her do that. My heart bleeds for her because she just wants to join in but doesn't quite have the social finesse.

I want a good way of explaining to her about the importance of taking it down a notch or three, something that a 4yo will understand and relate to.

Or a good book I can get to hammer the message home (she responds well to books)

Or your own anecdotes about how you have dealt with similar.

Or...I don't know, I just want to help my little girl so people don't avoid her when she is thrilled to see them and wants to be friends.

When my DCs did that I used to remove them gently but firmly from the object of their affections......I would put my hands on their arms and look at them in the eye and say firmly "Calm down." if they did not show signs of calming then I would remove them from the room along with myself to take 5 and get a drink of water.

My dd does this alot and Im often quite brutraly honest with her that people do not like this kind of behaviour as it is anoying and not how people should behave. I will also do as Val...says and ensure you are firm and give her time to calm down. I also remind my daughter of what is expected of her prior to such situations and remind her she will have more fun with X if she is respectfull and calm.

I must also point out that times Dhs and older children often have a good way of winding small children into such a frensy and they also need reminders of how to read these signals, just a little reminder it will end in tear and whos tears they will be and if they need to stop before it gets to this point tell them also. Its seems that maybe you Dh may need to have a little input in managing this a little more calmly if he is lossing his temper with DD after not seeing her all week. maybe if this situation is tackled she will learn how to react a little more approriatly with other people. its not unusal for kids of her age to be like this my DD gets the same then everything is poo wees and bums then iv lost her to it comletely!!!