boobaholism

[shhhw]

Hello, My DD is just 1 and I have been back at work for about three months. I am still having to come home at least once a day to feed her. If I leave it too long, so gets frantic (I am told), even pulling at her 3-year-old sister's top and trying to feed from her(!) With the help of my mum I have managed to get her off the (continual, continuous) night feeds, but she wants me all the time when I am here and even when I'm not (she is fine for around 4 hours)! Truly she is a boobaholic. I wouldn't mind if I were able to stay at home with her but it is really getting too much for me to manage. Any tips? She won't drink milk (formula or cows'), full stop, though she will have juice and water from a cup; she is eating well.

am bumping for you

so does your mum have her while you are out at work?
what does she try and do when she is getting "frantic"?
does she respond to any distractions? has she tried taking her out for the day so she isn't thinking about it?

are you sure the pulling at her sisters top is an attempt to feed? i mean, it would make more sense if she was pulling at your mums top surely? or, if she was that desperate she would do it to everyone
pulling clothes is just something they do i think

what would happen if you left her for a bit longer each day?

Thank you denbuilder!

thisis - yes, my mum has her. Diastractions / taking out etc work to a point, but only go so far! Oh yes, she is trying to feed from her sister - she does indeed pull at my mum's top / stuff her hand down her bra and try to pull out her boob too, but I thought that might be pretty standard, whereas I've never seen a baby try and find her toodler sister's boob before. She's not just pulling clothes - she looms in with her little mouth puckering and sort of puffing, as she does when she is coming to me for a feed.

I would like to leave her a bit longer in the day to stretch out the time gradually, but I teach, so I can only get home at lunchtime (and then tea time, if I have to go in in the evening which I often do). So if I don't come at lunch time because she seems OK then, but then two hours later she is going bananas, then we are stuck - not fair on my mum, or her (or me!).

I realise that part of the problem is that I don't really want to stop her if she wants it - I understand that stopping doesn't tend to work if you don't really want to - but I can't make myself want to stop, iyswim. And I have to go to work. I just thought someone might have a good tip either for distraction from the boob specifically (rather than general distraction, just hoping that distracts her from the boob as well as everything else), or for taking milk from a cup. (Or for getting rich quick so I can give up work.) THank you!

She might miss the comfort from the night feeds? Can your mum give plenty of cuddles and attention? Does she have a favourite toy or something that you can give her when you leave for work in the morning?

Have you tried giving expressed BM from a cup? Just to check it's not the taste of the formula or cows milk she doesn't like? If she takes it, then gradually mix in a bit of formula/cows milk every day until she gets used to it.

yes, introducing a comfort item might work. especially if you give it to her every time you feed... she'll become attached to it and it may be enough to calm her when she is getting particularly frantic.

I wonder if it's a szeparation thing actually. you've cut down (entirely?) on the night feeds, and you've gone back to work which means her time with you and her feeds are hugely reduced so that might just be upsetting her.

maybe it will just take more time