I'm *so* proud of my DD

[katymac]

She has been bullied for over 6 months.

We've had a very successful summer with lots of positive reinforcement, achievement and "firsts"

The school say she is a changed child - reverting to her previous parky self.....I know it's only 4 days but it's great

But today she got an birthday invite from the child doing the bullying. She started off saying she wanted to go. I said fine, but she couldn't complain if X started having a go again

We discussed that she could go bowling with DH & I, whether she went to the party or not.

She decided that she wouldn't go

Of course she is unlikely to stick to her decision as it will be too hard to say "no I don't want to come" to the girls face

But I thought it was very adult of her to say she wouldn't go

aww...how old is she?

7.....it is sensible of her isn't it

I won't make her go through with it tho'

it's very sensible!!! i was nowhere near that mature at her age!

was the other child's mother aware of the bullying? just wondered as it seems odd doesn't it?

would be fab if your dd stood up to her and said no, i', not coming

The Mum is well aware of the bullying

She asked me not to take it further with the school as it was being dealt with

I hope she is brave enough

I used to say yes, and then hide in my room and not go. When I read all the "why do people say they are coming to parties and not come" threads I do wince a bit.

Has the child who was bullying invited her just so she can bully her? Or is she a reformed character?

4 days into term - so I'm not sure if she is reformed or not

Whatever, YOUR child is the winner - she has come to terms with the bullying and wont let it affect her!!! She has every right to say NO she doesn't want to go, hope she changes her mind so long as she feels she is in control !! Good luck.

i was wondering if the mum had made her invite your dd in order to either try and get them to like each other or to make it seem like her dd isn't a bully... who knows though? maybe i am just cynical!

Of course Starlover....that's what I think

Just be careful for your daughters sake.

I actually don't know if it would be better for her to go or to say no

Way to go R! We're very proud of you.

Personally I wouldn't make her go. If she's said no then take her out with you and DH and don't mention it again. Why should that horrid little so and so get a pressie from such a gorgeous princess?

How does your dd feel about going on her own? could you go for a short while? no easy I know!!!

take her and friend somewhere else for the day. She wont miss the party if she is with a friend.

I think she is confused Pindy.....it's so complicated as there are only 3 girls in her year - they are supposed to be "very good friends" but this child just makes litle negative comments all the time (well once or twice a day - somedays saying nothing)

She wouldn't have to go by herself her "real best Friend" from the next year up would be there

Marslady - she is at Brownie camp this weekend - I'm so nervous (btw card should be on the way to you by mon-hopefully)

I still wouldn't take her. I hate the hypocrisy of pretending that everything is okay. Has this child apologised? Has her mother? The word bargepole comes to mind!

Well no-one has actually admitted the bullying is taking place.

The request to take it no further came when I was going to take dd to an educational psychologist....without an admition of any guilt

I think I'll let her do what she wants

horrible situation - good luck - hugs to dd and u

Good luck to your dd in whatever she decides to do

Thanks everyone - I'll just try to support her, whatever she decides