To all mums of boys with week bladder control

[bumbly]

Dear All

my little boy is three and a bit..had a rough time potty training and is now nearing toilet training

however nearly everytime i tell him off and he cries he wets imself now

is this something to worry about at this stage? or will he get psychiatric problems with being a wee-er..just don't want this to escalate to him being a little boy with problems...etc becoming bullied etc..how can i help? how can i help with bladder control under duress?

i can't sotp telling him/disciplining him...or should i keep complete cold turkey and let his bladder get stroner?

argh confused?

anyone???????

Hi bumbly,

I too have a 3 yo ds. We're lucky enough not to have bladder problems but have just come through two years of poo problems so I feel your pain.

It sounds to me like the weeing when he's told off is a diversionary (sp?) tactic (I'm no psychologist just mho) - as you'll need to get him changed etc after he's wee'd - and in the meantime the telling off is forgotten.

Maybe worth a visit to the docs to rule out a urinary disorder?

Try to stay calm when changing him after weeing and don't let the area of discipline be forgotten. "Let's get those wet pants off you, but you were still a naughty boy for playing with the ketchup" kind of thing...

And maybe use nappy pants for a while to make the changing less stressful?

maybe use a less confrontational method of discipline eg less actual 'telling off' and more towards a time out with an explanation?

that way there won't be an anxiety about the telling off itself and so you can split the two issues?

fwiw, ds1 is nearly 9 and still wets. also soils. no child has even noticed, and some days the teachers don't either, so i wouldn't be getting too stressed about bullying etc - way too far ahead to even stress about and will only make you more anxious - you being more anxious will make him more anxious etc ergo more accidents.