Help is it ok for a baby have its own bedroom

[hovehandyman]

Help! My partner and I disagree on wether or not our new baby should have his own room. We have just spent the last 3 years with our first born in our bedroom now partner says the new born MUST take her place because new borns should not be in their own bedroom. I think this over protectiveness is getting out of hand. New borns should not have their own bedrooms, come on?

I'm confused your first born was allowed to be in your room but your second born is not?

It is recomended to have babies with you for first six months to lower the risk of SIDS

I don't understand either - if it was OK for you to have DC1 in your bedroom for three years, why won't you have DC2 there?

Guidelines say that newborns are better in their parents' room.

Is it your DH that insisted it should be for three years and that is what you are unhappy with the prospect of another three years?

If that is the case then surely you can compromise? Doesn't have to be all or nothing surely?

More explanation we have a one bedroom flat!
we have a walk in cupboard I can convert to a sleepover bedroom to small for a bed but big enough for a cot. I say we have to make do with what we have and don't want our 3 year old disturbed by our new born.

OK, so you don't have very much space, but I think it's bizarre that you don't want DC1 disturbed by DC2, who needs to be sleeping by your side in your bedroom far more than a three-year-old does. Or that you think it's appropriate to stick a newborn in a cupboard just so that its older sibling doesn't get disturbed!

Can't you fit the cot into your bedroom as well as DC1's bed?

Yes your newborn should be in with you - but not in a cupboard

ttalloo simply answer no. The bedroom is is 9 x 7 feet and cant move in it as it is

Nope sorry small moses basket by your bed. Putting baby in the cupboard isn't going to stop your three year old being disturbed.

Not really a long term solution either. Can you not get a sofa bed and sleep with baby in the lounge and let three year old have the bedroom which you can the move baby into when old enough. Unless you are planning on moving you are going to need to find a long term sleeping plan

Dear God, hovehandyman, that is tiny. But putting the baby in the cupboard is not the solution. It needs to be next to you. Can you do co-sleeping?

I take it moving is not an option at this stage?

Moving is on the menu so it would only be temp. We have thought of losing the lounge and making 2 bedrooms but its manily used as a playroom so that would then mean our 3 year old loses that

Please dont think theres any selfish motives here I've been sleeping in the shed for the last year to give mum and toddler some space

Get a sofa bed - make that your bed and your bedroom your dd's bed and playroom, and keep your clothes etc in there.

Not ideal, but friends did this for a while and it was an improvement on a cramped bedroom. Also your dd is less likely to wake when the baby cries in the night.

JiggeryPopery's suggestion is good.

Your current bedroom becomes DD's bedroom and playroom. She does not need a bedroom AND separate playroom when you only have a one bed flat.

Your current lounge becomes your bedroom (with baby).

Or the other way round. Sleeping in the shed is definitely not a good solution!!

It sounds like you are trying to make sure your DD is not inconvenienced in any way, that is admirable but when a second child comes along it is to be expected that there will be some changes.