How much should I read in to my 5 year olds drawings?

[mummyloveslucy]

Hi, my 5 year old daughter has moderate learning and speech difficulties. She is a very happy friendly little sole and is enjoying being in year 1.
A lot of the girls in her class help her with things like dressing, showing her where things go and helping her to understand what she's ment to be doing. The teacher even caught one of them feeding her at lunch time. (She is very capable of feeding herself and using a knife and fork.)

I know she is far more capable than she lets on. She'd rather have one of the children fussing over her than to attempt to do things herself. The teacher is aware of this and is encouraging her to do more.

Anyway, I've noticed that when she draws a picture of her and a friend, she always draws herself quite a lot smaller. She is one of the tallest in the class, but even if the picture is of herself and the smallest girl, she'll still draw herself looking about 3 years younger.

Does this mean she's feeling inferior within the class? I always thought she was a very confident child but maybe she's not deep down. She might be feeling insecure. I think she's aware that she's not on the same level as the others.

She loves school though and has lots of friends. Her teacher is very pleased with the way she's settled in and the progress she's making. So maybe I'm reading too much into this?

Is there anything we can do at home to make her feel more confident in her own abilities? I want her to feel like she's as big as everyone else in the class.

bump

You can read as much or as little as you want. I think you are overthinking it TBH. Her teacher reports that she is pleased with her progress, you say she is happy and she is clearly enjoying herself. Mention it to the teacher if you think it would help.

Thanks. To be honest though I don't think mentioning it would make any difference as the teacher is already on to it, and working hard to make her feel more confident and getting her to be more independant.

I wondered wether we could do anything at home? She is an only child and I know I should make more of an effort to have more friends around to play but I wondered if there is anything else which will boost her self esteem?

i'm no expert at all, but I think I'd be tempted to ask her. in a casual, happy way. just "why have you drawn yourself smaller than xxx" - which could lead on to a (happy, casual) chat about her being tall, and grown up, and the things she's good at etc. I'm sure you do talk to her about such things anyway but maybe the pics are an opportunity for you to chat and boost her confidence

I would also read what you read from that picture. My son did a similar thing and it worried me for a bit until I thought about it.

Just keep telling her 'hey..you are much taller than that! etc

Wouldn't mention it to teacher though. Just giver her loads and loads of love and cuddles as I'm sure you do.

Thank you, that's a god idea to purn it into an oppertunity to say praise her and tell her what she's good at etc.

The sad thing is though, I can't think of anything she's good at that the rest of the class isn't better at. I've told her before, you're good at ballet, but she'll say but X and X are better than me etc. I'll then say something like "well I like watching you much better as you really enjoy ballet and I think you're more fun to watch". That makes her smile.
She enjoys lots of things but we haven't as yet found something that she's good at compared to the others in her class.

I often have to say to my son (and myself!!!) It's not a competition, it is NOT a competition.

Yes, just praise all she loves doing...even if she's not so brill at something praise her efforts. For examlpe I do this to my son's drawing and writing efforts. Actually unreadable and a bit crap to be honest but the point is he really really tried, bless him!

Doesn't she also have the best smile, give the best hugs, have the twinkliest eyes?

Oh yes, I always praise her efforts and say she has the best smile, cuddles etc.
I think it makes it harder when she has a very bright friend living a few doors down, who comes to play quite often and is very noticeably good at everything and is quite vocal in telling you so.
When they build a castle with lego etc, she always says hers is better etc, the same with drawing and puppet shows and everything you can think of.
I do praise her a lot but I get the feeling she knows damb well that her castle, her drawing isn't as good.

She really likes this girl BTW, so I can't really stop inviting her around. I'm not sure what my daughter sees in her as she's a bit of a madam, but there you go.

Are the friends older? My dds always drew older people taller. E.g. Grandma was always the tallest in family pictures as she was the oldest, but in real life she is shorter than most of the other members of the family.

No, she's one of the oldest in the class. I can see where he's comming from though.

I think she ounds like she's in a great school and is happy to be recieving the support and are of her peers. She is 5 and she is happy...my DD is 6 and draws poo all the time..she has no learning issues we know of and it did bother me beiefly...but then I thought ah...what of it! She;s a typical odd/grubby kid with an interest in muck!

Your DD sounds just fine to me...I think her pictures show how important her friends are to her.

Sounds and CARE not ounds and are!

Thank you. My daughter is also into toilet humor in a big way. It must be the age.
Her friends are very important too her and she's lucky to have so many who are so kind and understanding. We've never experienced any teasing or anything in the three years she's been there.