Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

4 month = night time hell...what should I do?

19 replies

sallybean · 30/09/2010 16:01

As with many, many other mums, we are suffering the 4 month mark with our little boy. For 4 weeks now he has started waking 2-3 times a night (after sleeping through from 7pm-6am for a good 8 weeks). Whilst I appreciate it's probably just a phase thing that will pass, I'm not sure on the best way to deal with him when he does wake. I try not to feed him or to get him out of his cot as during the day he settles really well by himself, but sometimes it takes an hour or two to settle him back. Any advice?

As advised by the HV (who thinks its a hunger issue), I have switched to 'hungry' milk & cut out breast feeding as he is a big baby (15lbs 6ozs). I've tried him on a tiny bit of baby rice (at 17 wks), but I don't think he's ready for it yet as he's not sure what to do with it and certainly doesn't take enough to fill him up.

Any wise, experienced mummies please advise... thank you!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Latootle · 30/09/2010 16:06

i think some babies go through the night too early then probably realise it. knowing creatures that they are. I would just offer a feed,change nappy but no talking or light on and straight back down. try giving the baby rice from a little syringe it goes more into the mouth and then they do swallow. at 15lbs he is not too young for baby rice. and I would think that he is hungry,

TheSugarPlumFairy · 30/09/2010 16:11

Not claiming to be wise in any way shape or form , but...

When DD went through this i would take her out of her cot and sit in her nursery and quietly cuddle/soothe her for a bit and then as soon as she was calm, would put her back in her cot. She would eventually fall back to sleep. I had to take everything out of her cot that could be vaguely considered entertaining however.

The first time she woke i fed her but it was obvious she was only eating because i was offering, not because she was so hungry. it did work to make her sleepy but it completely threw out her feeds for the next day.

I think you really do need to ride it out though. It is developmental thing. I know with DD it hit just as she was learning to roll and was suddenly so much more dexterous with her hands. Her little brain was working over time to process all these new skills and it just didnt have time to sleep.

Hang in there.

TakeLovingChances · 30/09/2010 16:59

You are not alone! Up and down the UK there are thousands of women tearing their hair out about the same thing with their own kids!

DS is 7 months old now, but I can remember the stress, upset and confusion when he was 4 months old and waking every HOUR some night

I just waited and waited and fed him when he was hungry and soothed him when he was annoyed and eventually it passed.

Just keep calm and ride it out.

Octaviapink · 30/09/2010 17:35

Why wouldn't you feed him? 4 months is growth spurt time and he's far too young to completely give up overnight feeds.

Octaviapink · 30/09/2010 17:38

Also the bfeeding will settle him far better than a bottle will, or 'hungry' milk.

Original poster

sallybean · 30/09/2010 17:53

Thank you so much for your advice ladies. I have done a little of all of the above & its reassuring to know that it will pass...
Here's hoping for a better night tonight?!?!? :)

OP posts:

Original poster

sallybean · 30/09/2010 17:56

Octaviapink - I did feed him initially, but it really disrupted his feeds the next day. I was advised that BF was not sustaining him enough (as he's such a big lad) and was spending more & more of my day with him attached, it got to the point where I had to find an alternative for him (he dropped on his growth chart). I thought that Bf would settle him better than a bottle too, but apparently not - food is food no matter where it comes from with him!

OP posts:

AngelDog · 30/09/2010 19:16

There's not much you can do other than keep demand feeding and do whatever it takes to get you as much rest as you can.

Baby rice will fill his stomach with something without many calories - he needs milk at this stage, not solids.

My DS was feeding 3 or 4 times a night at 4 months, instead of once or twice as he did before.

I'm a bit :( that you were told that bf wasn't sustaining him enough because he was a big baby. Unless there's a medical problem involved, or you were feeding on a schedule rather than on demand, I can't see why that would be an issue. Lots of babies like my 99th centile weight DS are absolutely fine on just breastmilk. That's not a criticism of you, OP - I think you've had some wrong advice from the HVs.

There's info on the 4 month sleep regression here, here, here and here.

Octaviapink · 30/09/2010 20:03

I agree with AngelDog - my dd was on the 98th centile at this point having gone up from the 25th at birth, and after she boosted my supply a bit (by doing exactly what you describe - being attached all day for a bit) it was fine.

pigleychez · 30/09/2010 21:54

My DD2 is 4mth and going through the same thing. Shes was sleeping through untill recently and is now up once or twice for a feed.
Its annoying but theres not much you can do about it so just have to ride it out.

When she wakes shes fed and then (hopefully) goes back off witout too much hassle. However some nights it can take a while! Your doing the right thing by keeping Nights dark and boring.
I wouldnt worry about his feeds being messed up the next day. He needs feeding when he needs feeding. My DD just continues the next day feeding every 3/4 hours. You can get back into the routine feeding when the sleeping improves.

DD1 did exactly the same thing but didnt sleep through again till 9mths old! Really hoping that we dont last that long again this time!

EldonAve · 30/09/2010 21:58

similar story with sleep here

I just feed mine and hope he goes back to sleep
We've had a few rough nights where he won't settle but I think he's teething

Imagine you wake in the night and want a drink but aren't allowed one

Mumcah · 30/09/2010 22:26

Same story here,my DS is also four months was sleeping through and for the last couple of weeks been up every night.

I do a dreamfeed at 10:30pm and I don't feed him til 7/8am.I know he's not hungry as he's not that interested in his morning bottle.However I'm not suggesting your baby isn't hungry!

My DS is 20lbs and in 9-12 month clothes so a big boy,he's on 5 7oz bottles and some baby rice and puree at 5pm.

So no advice......but you are not alone!

Crikeyme · 01/10/2010 22:31

Having the same thing with our 20-week-old daughter - she's always woken a couple of times in the night for a feed and settled back really easily (although since starting teething at 10 weeks, we can't get her to even think about sleeping without a dummy to get her started off).

However, the last few weeks have seen her a) trying solids, b) finally spending some time on her tummy, c) discovering her hands and feet, and d) pulling herself up to sitting with a bit of help.

So she's had loads of developmental stuff to process, and it's clearly making it really hard for her to settle down to sleep. She's gone from taking a couple of naps in the morning and another in the afternoon, to really resisting any naps at all. She's clearly exhausted by the time she sleeps, whether it's for a nap or for the night, but still wakes up an hour or so later squealing with excitement and wanting to play. Today I should have given her 2 solid meals with milk, but reduced it to one because she's not drinking anything like as much as she was even a week ago, and I'm concerned that she needs more - we'll see if that makes any difference tonight...

Angeldog's post above has links to some great articles that make it suddenly all make sense, and are really reassuring - in the meantime, I know exactly how you feel!

moocowme · 02/10/2010 12:34

it could be teething? just go with it or try something for teething and see if this helps.

Original poster

sallybean · 04/10/2010 15:12

It's been going on for over a month now...

OP posts:

Mumcah · 10/10/2010 05:59

Hi Sallybean,

How does your LO try & settle back to sleep...does he have a dummy or comforter or anything?
I decided on Thursday to get rid of DS's dummy as I was sick of getting up & putting it in every time he woke.
There has been a bit of crying at naps but I stay with him. He has slept through since we took it away,now it could be coincidence but he is learning to self settle.

I had a flick through The Baby Whisperer Solves All your Problems which was interesting as it was like it was written for my DS. Anyway I would recommend it as she talks about routines and how they should gradually change as they get older.

Mumcah · 10/10/2010 06:02

C'td.....so by now it's better if you can get them on a 4 hour feed cycle rather than 3.
Do you still think it's a hunger issue by the way?

ClimberChick · 10/10/2010 06:13

yeah a month (or two or 3 in our case) is also normal

Mae34 · 10/10/2010 15:47

My DD, now 18 weeks, had been waking every 3 hours for the last 3-4 weeks having previously done 6 hour stretches. I just fed her (EBF) each time and in the last few days she seems to be settling, cross fingers, as she has gone back to her 6 hour sleeps. She was not getting much in the day cos she was being too nosy to feed! So, it does seem to pass (before the next thing strikes )...

Flip