Help my 3 year old hurt another child on first day of nursery.

[diet2morro]

My little boy who has just turned 3 at the end of August had his first day at nursery today. He was only there for one hour and has never been left with anyone other than family. In that short time he hurt another child when the teacher refused to let him paint. He grabbed the childs face and dug his nails in then ripped off his badge in anger. He was sent to time out and eventually apologised. The teacher who spoke to me looked horrified at the behaviour and the poor child had marks on her face. I have spoken to my child and told him it was wrong and he just said he had said sorry. I feel gutted and I am dreading seeing this little ones parents tomorrow who have every right to be angry. Has anyone else experienced this or anything similar.

I very much the doubt that the nursery will have told the other parents which child hurt their's.

I also doubt very much that the taecher was horrified. If she was she is going to be spending the rest of her career horrified, at all the similar incidents.

Dd1 started nursery at 3 months old (I was a single parent and needed to work). I cannot even remember all the injuries she had/inflicted on others.

It's normal. You only need to worry if it is something your child does regularly. And if that is the case any decent school will help you and access the right support for you and your son.

He was probably just feeling overwhelmed and over excited. By all means chat to him about how/why it is wrong, but don't dwell on it or feel bad about it.

Thanks shinyandnew I hope your right and they don't say which child it was I don't want him labelled the naughty boy before he has had a chance to experience nursery. I do wish I had sent him earlier but pointless dwelling on what i should have done thanks again for support.

I have worked in a pre-school for the last year. I really would be extremely shocked if the other child's parent's had been told it was your son. That really is not the done thing. However, the child may well have told his/her parents themselves.
Please don't worry about it, nursery staff really are used to this sort of thing! Perhaps she was more embarrassed at having to tell you. I hate having to tell parents if their DC hasn't behaved quite as well as we would hope them to the nursery staff will most likely be pleased that you have spoken to him about it. Perhaps you could reassure them that you have done so.

Ah thanks missp201o, didn't sleep well last night thinking about it. I will take your advice and speak to the teacher today, i'm hoping day 2 is better. Thanks for responding!

When their was hairpulling by my child i wasnt even told if it were a boy or girl so doubt they would tell the aother parents anything.

Thanks everyone for great advice and reassurance I spoke to teacher today and let her know we were dealing with the behaviour and asked her to keep me updated on progress. After too much bachs rescue remedy I collected my son and he had been fine today. I gave him lots of praise and a treat for good behaviour hopefully it will sink in. Mind you I felt awful when I saw the little girl with a scratch on her face and asked the teacher to pass on my apologies to the parent which she agreed to do. Not back til next week so just got to be consistant with my little one, but for now large glass of wine helping the stress levels !!!

Thanks for the encouragement I hope next weeks ok he has talked about it lots and knows its wrong so fingers crossed!!!

I wouldn't worry too much. Most children will hit and scratch at some stage. Not saying it's acceptable. The fact that he accepted time out on his first day and then said sorry is a sign that he's certainly fine as far as his respect for the nursey is concerned. A lot of children would have refused time out on their first day.