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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Irrationally Upset DS (2yrs) over my HAIR!

14 replies

kiwidreamer · 15/09/2010 13:53

Over the past couple of weeks DS (2.2yrs) has becoming increasingly distressed when I put my hair back in a pony tail. Now I know in the grander scheme of things this is really a non issue and other parents have far more important concerns but I was wondering if anyone could shed some light on this for me / experienced something similar etc.

If he sees me tie it back then he gets very sad and says 'Oh No Mummy, oh no hair all gone' and I show him the pony tail and tickle and have fun with it but if I dont take it out or let him take it out he will start crying! Earlier in the week I tried to brush him off and said not to worry it was just fine and mummy needed her hair away from her face and he lay on the ground and sobbed!!!

Should I just indulge him and its just a -strange- -and- -disconcerting- phase or just ignore him and keep tying it back and he'll get past it.

He might be trying to tell me I look ugly with my hair back but some days I really need it out the way!!!

Toddlers are very odd!

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Original poster

kiwidreamer · 15/09/2010 13:54

argh sorry mucked up strike outs

OP posts:

Adair · 15/09/2010 13:56

oh, gosh, toddlers are funny. You just look a bit different and he needs to get used to it, bless him. My dd cried when I came back from the hairdresser with short hair (thanks dd).

I'd carry on as you are (letting him take it out, maybe let him choose the hairband, reassuring), and eventually it will be ok...

Iklboo · 15/09/2010 13:57

If it's any consolation my cousin & I bawled our eyes our for hours after our nana went and had a make-over at Kendals and put her teeth in. We were about 6 at the time - it was becuase she 'didn't look like nana any more'.
Ds is nearly 5 and doesn't like me wearing make up. We went to a christening on Sunday and he said 'why are you putting all that on you face mummy? You look beautifuller without it'.

colditz · 15/09/2010 13:57

My mother had a perm when my brother was two, and he wouldn't go near her for three days

edam · 15/09/2010 13:59

I think he's just saying it makes you look different and he doesn't like that. Well within the normal range of opinion for a toddler, if that helps!

MamaLaMoo · 15/09/2010 16:14

Husband appeared at front door in new long raincoat last night and DD 21mo ran wailing into my arms, wouldn't go near him till he took it off.

I guess they don't like dramatic changes in appearance. DD pulls the hairbands out of my hair when I tie my hair back so she can play with them which really hurts!

crumpet · 15/09/2010 16:18

my ds went through a phase of not going near my mother when she put her glasses on - I think these reactions are fairly common

edam · 15/09/2010 16:36

My sister wouldn't go near my mother when she tried out contact lenses - she wasn't Mummy without her glasses!

Eliza70 · 15/09/2010 20:21

My DS is like this, he doesn't like it if I use a hairband or clip to keep my fringe off my face. Sometimes he's ok and asks me to put a clip in his fringe too. V cute!!

Original poster

kiwidreamer · 15/09/2010 21:43

Funny thing is tho that I've put my hair back / up extremely regularly since the day he was born, more often than not I'd say. So weird that suddenly he minds!

Actually your stories have reminded me when my Dad shaved off his moustasche when I was about 5yrs old I didnt like it very much at all, he didnt look like my Daddy without it LOL

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Original poster

kiwidreamer · 15/09/2010 21:45

Ha Ha just remembered DH (before he was DH) shaved his gotee off once and I urged him to grow it back with extreme haste... hmmmm now slightly disconcerted with the link between those two stories PMSL

OP posts:

bean612 · 16/09/2010 11:55

Ha! DD (21 months) has just started doing exactly the same. If I tie my hair back - or even if I just push it back with my hands while chatting, etc - she immediately says "Hair down! Hair down!" Like you, I've always regularly tied my hair back, especially since it doesn't get washed as often since she came along it's long and gets in my face, but it's only in the past month or so that it's suddenly started to bother her. I often say "Let's just go and do X and then I'll take it down," then by the time we've done whatever it is, she's forgotten about my hair altogether.

She's also very particular about my glasses. It used to be that she wanted them on at all times - so when we were lying in the pitch dark at 5 a.m. (her start-the-day time, bleurgh), she'd try to insist I wore them. Now she doesn't want them on, which is a bit tricky since I'm totally blind without them. She tries to rip them off, and doesn't get it when I tell her "But DD, now I can't blimmin see you!"

clare40 · 16/09/2010 15:55

I have this with my 3 yr old with regards to my glasses. I normally wear them but occasionally wear contact lenses and he hates it!

He will get really upset if he wakes in the night and I go to him without my glasses. Often I have to go and put them on before he lets me comfort him. He has always been like that, and I have put it down to a little quirk!

pranma · 16/09/2010 18:00

When I was on chemotherapy I wore a wig......
Imagine the reaction when very small dgs pulled my hair!!!!

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