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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Immature almost 3 year old?? [hmm]

23 replies

yummypopcorn · 14/09/2010 22:21

Can you be immature at 3?
A 'friend' commented on my DS today. "His speech is quite baby like still isn't it"
"oh still has a dummy and a blanket"

Can you baby your child? I feel like perhaps she is right??

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

LadyintheRadiator · 14/09/2010 22:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

yummypopcorn · 14/09/2010 22:28

He is a bit behind I guess but not enough to worry anyone. He is a bit addicted to his dummy and we really try to keep it for night times only.

He does still have naps, asks to be carried, very lazy at walking but I think having a new sister doesn't help with that. He has only just started potty training too.

OP posts:

EvilTwins · 14/09/2010 22:29

He's not even 3. Don't worry.

CheckingCheques · 14/09/2010 22:30

Ignore. She's not a friend if she says that. You watch, her advanced child will be taken over by yours in no time. Bet yours can climb better than hers, or something else. They're all different and they's all great.

FunnysInTheGarden · 14/09/2010 22:34

He is still a baby. Don't worry, and let him be a baby for a bit longer. Won't be long before he is a fully fledged school child

ie 'Mummy this yoghurt is quite sour'..........I didn't even know he knew the word 'sour'

plonker · 14/09/2010 22:37

To my mind (and I know people will disagree, and that's fine) almost 3 is still a baby ...

3 years, 3 short years. It's nothing is it? He's tiny and very immature and that's just as it should be

FunnysInTheGarden · 14/09/2010 22:39

plonker of course you are right. Children of 3 are still babies. We shouldn't expect them to grow up too soon

Original poster

yummypopcorn · 14/09/2010 22:47

Thank-you. I love my big baby!! And my little one to of course!

OP posts:

facebook · 15/09/2010 07:49

Oh my God! What sort of a friend says that? Seriously, ignore! My ds is 3.2 and although he's never had a dummy (his choice), he still carries his little blankie and teddy bear everywhere with him. He starts nursery school in september and he is taking them in his bag with him but the teachers weren't at all suprised or alarmed by it! They said a lot of 3 yr olds need a bit of extra comfort.

He still has nap too, sometimes 2.5 hours a day and still asks to be picked up all the time when we've walked for a few mins. I am trying to say no now but he's an only child so I actually have no reason not to baby him a bit.

He talks a lot and foms very good sentences but his pronunciation can be very babbled and babyish. Just keep talking with him and asking him questions, reading to him etc and he'll get there. So many of my friend's 3 yr olds are barely talking or really can not be understood at all so your boy sounds fine.

Agree they are just babies at 3.

Kammy · 15/09/2010 09:21

Gosh this is ridiculous! In fact research showa that children that grow up too quickly are less happy than thier peers. They often feel under too much pressure He's 3!

My ds is 8 and still has a 'snuggy', soft toys and sometimes enjoys asking me to cuddle him like a baby. He's wise enough not to do this at school or around certain friends. However, he is particularly advanced in other areas .

Your friend sounds rude.

Kammy · 15/09/2010 09:21

Or shows even

pompadourprincess · 15/09/2010 09:29

My DS 6 still has his blanket that he has had since birth. He has it for bed only as he would be like iggle piggle otherwise.
My ds2 who is 2.8 is miles off being potty trained and still sleeps in a cot.
I think you have nothing to worry about, he is still a baby and I wouldn't be happy if a "friend " said that to me

parkj83 · 15/09/2010 09:31

My nephew has only just been potty trained, and he's 3.11! He takes after his mum in that he's very relaxed/takes his time about trying new things... it took him till he was over a year old to figure out how to both roll over and crawl, he was nearly 2 when he started walking, close on 3 when he started stringing basic sentances together... you get the picture.

I would say that half of it was his mum babying him not being very proactive about teaching him stuff - she still carries him about now ffs, and he's still very clingy.

Don't worry about it.

parkj83 · 15/09/2010 09:33

sorry, that doesn't sound very supportive, does it!

(honestly, I'm not saying you're anything like his mum!)

Bumperlicious · 15/09/2010 10:16

DD is 3.3 and only started potty training 2 months ago, gave up dummies 6 months ago (that was traumatic!), still has a bottle before bed.

Lots of her friends still have 'snuggles'. I really wouldn't worry. Are you worried about the speech? Might be worth speaking to the HV. But as for being immature, how ridiculous! Of course you want to baby him, especially with another new baby.

Original poster

yummypopcorn · 15/09/2010 19:29

Thanks again. He is really needy at the moment, but loves loads of positive praise and 1:1 time. I really think boys aspecially need a bit more time to grow and they are young for such a short amount of time.

OP posts:

Anenome · 15/09/2010 20:24

Sheesh! My SIX ear old still asks to be carried sometimes and sucks her thumb! In my experience the UK is shocking for expecting kids to be walking, off the dummy/bottle and discussing Jung before most other countres even send theirs to school!

Almost three is still a baby in my book!

I have 2...they're 6 and 2 and a half. They're both babies to me!

cory · 15/09/2010 20:40

"My nephew has only just been potty trained, and he's 3.11! He takes after his mum in that he's very relaxed/takes his time about trying new things... it took him till he was over a year old to figure out how to both roll over and crawl, he was nearly 2 when he started walking, close on 3 when he started stringing basic sentances together... you get the picture. I would say that half of it was his mum babying him not being very proactive about teaching him stuff - she still carries him about now ffs, and he's still very clingy. "

parkj, I really cannot imagine any baby not learning to roll over and crawl when he is ready for it just because of lack of teaching, nor any baby who is not physically ready learning those things just because he is taught to do them. Now if you were talking French verbs or equations you might have a point, but crawling and walking are things babies learn naturally (unless kept permanently on their back in a Moses basket), when their bodies are ready.

I am glad you are not my SIL. Dd did not roll over until very late, never crawled at all, and did not walk until nearly 2. I spent all my time encouraging her to do things and letting her try things. She had low muscle tone. I was still carrying her a lot at age 3, not because I wanted to, but because her body wasn't ready.

ln1981 · 15/09/2010 21:32

my ds has just turned 3, his speech isnt great (tho it is improving now he is at nursery)- he has 2 older siblings however so never gets a word in edgeways. And he has no interest at all in going to the toilet!!
i wouldnt be too worried. i felt that i had babied ds but it was my friend who pointed out that not talking wasnt an issue, because of reason above, but also because of the stuff that he actually could do !! and she was right- he was a quick walker, he has no fear when it comes to climbing things that even my oldest wont climb, loves puzzles and trying to count and so on.
and i really dont think you can 'baby' them-you are being his mum!

Rillyrillygoodlooking · 16/09/2010 03:41

your LO sounds like mine. DS is 3 in amonth, he has a muslin, a dummy at night and his speech is babyish. He doesn't make many sentences, doesn't use the words more, again, mine, that kind of thing, he just cries/whines.

And when I ask him, are you a big boy or a baby boy he always replies Baby boy.

I dread potty training ...

It is awful when a person comments on your child like that. Really insensitive. I hope you can brush it off.

nomedoit · 16/09/2010 03:58

Oh ignore her. My daughter had speech help at 2.5 because she was barely talking. Now, a year later, you can't shut her up.

She also, at three and a half, sucks her thumb at night, has a comfort blanket, wants to be carried every time we go for a walk and likes to play 'being the baby' which means me rocking her in my lap.

In my opinion children are pushed way too fast these days. Let him be little!

nomedoit · 16/09/2010 04:05

Also, our speech therapist recommended 3 things which really helped:

Giving DD longer to respond. Ask your child a question then mentally count to ten slowly. I used to jump in too quickly and speak for her;

Lengthening sentences by one or two words. So when DD said "Want milk" I would say "You want milk"

CD/DVD's by Laurie Berkner (you could probably get them on Amazon, I am in the US). The tune and rhymes apparently help with speech. I am sure they helped us.

That's all we did actually and I saw a huge improvement though I suspect that might have happened over time anyway. Some children just talk later, I did and so did my DS.

nomedoit · 16/09/2010 04:08

Laurie Berkner CD

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