How much do you play with your toddler each day?

[bride2b]

My DS is 17 months and I spend as much time with him as I can but I feel guilty for not playing with him all day. He is quite happy toddling around while I do housework etc. Quite often it is just me and him in the house as DP works long hours. I attend the local playgroups twice a week but I can't help but feel I should be entertaining him more.

I think you're doing the right thing. IMO it's a big mistake to entertain your kids all the time as they don't develop any self-sufficiency and ability to use their imaginations and find things to do. We have a 9 and 7 year old in our house who are completely incapable of entertaining themselves for 5 minutes without adult input - even at a play park! You end up with a situation where you have to take them out and "do" things with them all the time and the older they get the more expensive that gets. If your DS is quite happy toddling around while you get on with housework then I would say you're doing a fine job!

I have a 17 month old DS too and I'm not sure I play with him enough.
He likes books so I read him all his books usually in the morning which takes about half an hour, I try to play ball with him in the garden etc but he doesn't seem that interested in his toys at the moment. Sometimes I think he's bored!
I always get out with him somewhere every day, like the park or to the toddler group or soft play and he comes on the school run with me twice a day and he likes playing in the school yard.
I think he needs some new toys to engage him more. I also worry that he sees too much t.v, he's busy watching the simpsons with DD (who's 9) at the moment. Not sure that's very good for him!

I know how you feel. My DP says the fact that I worry about this stuff means I shouldn't worry about it.

I always think this. I find as DS gets older (2.7) I play less. I find pushing cars around very boring. [guilt]

I did play with him and play dough this morning. I read to him every night and in the day if he asks me to. He is very happy to play by himself and I am keen for him to entertain himself and not be dependant on someone to constantly entertain him. My friend has 2 children who are very demanding and trying to do anything with them there is slightly annoying.

If DS asks me to play, then I join in. Sometimes he likes me to draw pictures with him. A lot of the time he is happy to play with his cars and his garage alone.

Kids need to learn how to entertain themselves. As a parent you need to be on hand to make sure they are not hurting themselves or others and not destroying the house!

As my two girls have got older, I've done less and less with them until they actively don't want me to play in their games.

But they are still up for a bit of a water fight, treasure hunt or chase and tickle monster

Leave them too it!!! If they're happy to play alone be grateful, it's a great skill to have and it's really really not a good idea to play with your children every waking moment. They need to learn to cope with being bored, use their imaginations and think creatively about how to fill their time.

My 4 year old dd plays on her own happily now but struggled with this before the age of 3 but I trained her to do it from about 18m old. I do plenty of stuff with her but playing make believe etc, is mind crushingly boring and there was no way I'd have been able to sustain it so therefore she's had to develop the skill of playing alone.

Playing with your kids constantly is not an indicator of good parenting it's an indicator of wannabe good parenting. There's a difference.

"Playing with your kids constantly is not an indicator of good parenting it's an indicator of wannabe good parenting. There's a difference."

I like that, it makes me feel less guilty and is very true.

couldn't tell you, but concur with the views expressed here. DD is nearly 20 mo and pretty good at pootering around the house poking her nose in independent play. If she wants help or company she asks, or brings you to join in with things. We do paint with her, play games in the garden, help her build blocks, read books etc, but mostly she just amuses herself. She's going to be an only child, and let's face it, most of the time one has to find one's own entertainment. I worry that being constantly stimulated means problems when they are older and full of hormones. Her cousin needs constant attention and it's much harder work!

I agree with what everyone else has said, but want to add that a 17 month-old will be completely fascinated by 'helping' you with whatever you are pottering about doing (with the possible exception of MNing ). Doing a bit of hoovering or dusting, loading the dishwasher or the washing machine etc etc are all learning experiences for him. At that age ds1 would stand at the sink and do 'washing-up' with all his plastic plates and cups for hours.

DS loves helping too. He loads the washing machine for me, likes helping daddy do the dishes. He gets a duster when I am polishing and an attachment from the vacuum to copy me whilst I vacuum. I am keen to encourage him being helpful and he will often tidy up without being asked now.