my 3 yo cries when toys snatched from him

[nikkispain]

my 3 year old boy, who is generally happy and boisterous and gets on well with other children, gets really upset if someone snatches a toys from him. i don't know what to advise him to do in these situations as i don't want him snatching things back, but i don't want him to be a 'cry-baby' either. he had his first day at pre-school today, and from what i can gather this happened quite alot and i am worried how he is going to cope.

You have two choices here - he cries or he snatches it back. No 3 yr old is going to be reasonable. At that age it's all "mine" and if someone snatches it, they are taking "my" thing away. All you can do is tell him that if somone snatches his toy he should say "can i have it back please" and if the other kid refuses, he has to tell the teacher. It will not do other kids any harm to be told that they mustn't grab toys from others

I taught/am teaching my dd (with her baby brother) to NOT snatch back, but to find another alternative to offer as a swap. She sometimes 'bigs up' the new item 'do you want this GREAT YELLOW CAR?'. Then she calmly says 'can i have x back please? or 'i need the blue car, ds' and holds hand out. It works. Occasionally ds runs away and she waits, then he comes and gives it back. Really!

Or she says 'shall we play with it together>' and then she suggests something.

BUT I agree with Irishmu, that the other child needs to learn it is not nice to snatch too. So def find a teacher if the above doesn't work...

We had this with DD at the same age. Her fab nursery taught her to be more assertive i.e. to say "No, that's mine. Give it back". Surprisingly the other kids did.

My DS was like that, but rather than crying he just sat there staring at the other child quietly, wanting the toy but unwilling to do anything about it. His face used to break my heart. Now at 3 1/2 he has finally learned to hold onto the toy when someone tries to snatch it, and move it away from their reach. I must admit to doing a bit of 'hovering' at play groups and stopping some of the grabbing!!