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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Hairwash Hell - please help

23 replies

emmywoo · 01/09/2010 20:44

My dd is 3.5yo and has never liked having her hair washed. It is getting worse and worse and tonight she got so worked up she was sick in the bath. We have tried everything: towl to cover eyes, the mothercare Jug etc but nothing works. After tonight I just dont know what to do and need some help or ideas as the way forward. Thanks xx

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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BellaBearisWideAwake · 01/09/2010 20:53

bumping because I would love to know the answer - we only wash DS's hair when we really have to because it is so traumatic for all involved.

anonandlikeit · 01/09/2010 20:55

ds1 always hated his hair wash but strangely is OK in the shower, worth a try if you've not already.

azazello · 01/09/2010 20:55

Bumping again. DD only screams now instead of thrashing around trying to hurt everyone but has to be allowed her dummy... Combing is also out.

She did cope well at the hairdressers but I'm a bit reluctant to pay for a weekly shampoo and set

jenroy29 · 01/09/2010 20:56

Goggles.
Washing the bits that the strap covers is a faff but little ones hair doesn't really get greasy does it?

ivykaty44 · 01/09/2010 20:57

goggles - put googles on and don't worry about the hair that is under the bit of goggle strap

let them comb their own hair and keep the hair shortish and regular cuts as then it will not get so tangley

a good conditioner for getting tangles out

Original poster

emmywoo · 01/09/2010 20:57

she hates the shower as well, however.... we went on holiday to Devon in June and stayed in a caravan and she didnt mind the shower in the caravan so much as the water pressure wasnt so bad and came out quite slowly. I ahve been looking in the internet or a shower hose to attach to our taps but we have a mixer tap and i cant find it, she is also getting too heave for me to hold int he shower as well now.

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ivykaty44 · 01/09/2010 20:59

oh and when they are wearing the goggles let them do the rubbing in bit.

i would put a peeny size peice of shampoo on my palm and rub my hands together then smear over thier ahri - letting them get envolved helps and makes it fun

Original poster

emmywoo · 01/09/2010 21:04

the worst bit for me is the rinsing out, she gets hysterical and tonight was sick. :(

OP posts:

Iwishiwasasleep · 01/09/2010 21:05

I don't know if this will help but after 5 years of screaming at bathtime I think we have solved our problem. I get DD's to stand up in the bath and put their heads back. I only use conditioner and the shower spray while DH holds their hand and a towel just in case. It's working for us as the biggest problem I had was that shampoo always got in their eyes. It's over with quickly too so that helps.

Both DD's have curly hair so brushing is still a pain but bathtime is a lot easier

ThatDamnDog · 01/09/2010 21:10

DS is 3, for his birthday he got a flannel glove puppet - crocodile or dinosaur type thing - which he'll allow to "eat" his hair. So I've been able to wipe it a bit at least! If I abandon hope of washing the front inch or two I can shampoo and rinse the back and top of his head just by encouraging him to put his chin up now. The puppet was a big step forward though, not sure where it came from but he's really good with it.

RunningOutOfIdeas · 01/09/2010 21:15

As others have written, I have had most success with goggles. DD used to be absolutely fine with hair washes until about 6 months ago. I don't know why they suddenly became the worst thing imaginable. I think she has a very sensitive head, so the shower is only OK if it is gentle.

Hair brushing is no longer a trauma. I bought a tangle teezer brush and J&J detangling spray.

fuzzypicklehead · 01/09/2010 21:17

I'm in the same hell with you. So bad that if anyone mentions the bath, gets in the bath, shows a bath on TV, etc. DD will burst into tears/be sick/faint. We've tried the jugs, goggles, shampoo guard, shower, etc. with no result. But strangely she's quite happy to get her hair wet in the swimming pool or the paddling pool. I pointed this out to her once and that evening she asked if I would wash her hair in the paddling pool. (cue me running buckets of bubbly hot water for the paddling pool on quite a cool evening, but the girls both loved it) Then went back to screaming the next day.

She will let me brush her scalp with a natural brush and wet her hair with a spray bottle, so I usually do that. I heard that Tresemme has a new dry shampoo out, so I May give that a try to freshen up as well.

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 01/09/2010 21:22

what happens if you don't wash it? stop trying?

let her have a few baths of just playing around. may turn out that at some point she lies down and accidentally gets her hair wet and then again and again and eventually she gets used to having wet hair.

just a thought!

OOh and what happens in you are in the bath with her and get her to wash your hair a few times??

ivykaty44 · 01/09/2010 21:25

if you get a pair of decent goggles - you put the goggles on dry and onto dry skin and the sucktion locks and will not let water inot the ey area at all - so then there is no problem with putting water over the head gently

get your dc to put the goggles on and place their face in the water and try it out well before you wash their hair with the goggles on - explain you wna tthem to try as it is exciting - you could have goggles and do the same so that they can see it works your eyes are all dry

but as soon as you take off the goggles and then put them back onto t wet face -they are likely to leak

kitkatxxx · 01/09/2010 21:27

Hi, my dd has always hated washing her hair so I luckily found this kind of shield that u put on the child's head and it works like a dream no water and shampoo gets to the child's eyes. I cannot remember what it was called but I bought it from mothercare online.

Bellagio · 01/09/2010 23:14

Another fan of the hair/face shield here. We have gone from full on tantrum to not even looking up from his bath toys during hairwashing.
It really does work, ours is from Boots, cost around £3 and is made of the same kinda rubbery material that some mouse mats are made of.
Hope you find something that helps.

kitkatxxx · 02/09/2010 00:13

My dd's shield is made of the same material as Bellagio mentioned above. Best thing I have ever bought :)

kitkatxxx · 02/09/2010 00:13

My dd's shield is made of the same material as Bellagio mentioned above. Best thing I have ever bought :)

Original poster

emmywoo · 02/09/2010 12:10

Thanks guys, I will go to boots and have a look at the getting shield and will keep you updated, fingers crossed. xxx

OP posts:

zandy · 02/09/2010 12:17

You're all very indulgent.

I used to just 'do it'. Ignore the screaming/shouting/thrashing/being sick. Quick wash, rinse, bobs your uncle.
The quicker its done, the sooner they stop making a fuss.

(p.s. Before I got to this point, I did all the 'halo', 'goggles', and pandering, but it all took forever and they still kept screaming, so one day I just thought 'sod it', and just got on with it)

witlesssarah · 02/09/2010 12:25

I'm with stop washing it crowd. i have never washed DS's hair with shampoo, just water. He's 4 and his hair looks great, not greasy, not smelly. Shampoo is a con. I use conditioner on my own (the curly girl method) but with LO's you can just stop.

Wholelottalove · 02/09/2010 22:00

DD (bit younger - 2.4) went through a phase of being terrified of the bath after a poo incident, so on people's advice here, we stopped trying to get her to sit in it and kind of hosed her down standing up and threw a bit of water over her hair.

It took a few weeks, but in her own time she regained her confidence and is now happy to have baths again. Ditto with hair washing, she will now sit and tip her head back and let us wash it with no fuss. Found making a big fuss about 'magic cream/brush/spray' (tangle teaser and leave in conditioner/conditioning spray) helped. Also, I got in with her a few times and she helped me wash my hair which seemed to help as we took it in turns.

It never worked for us just getting on with it whilst she screamed - she got more and more upset.

Original poster

emmywoo · 04/09/2010 19:16

update for you all - i got the hair wash shied from boots and trialed it tonight. It was the 1st time in 4 years that I have washed my dd hair and she hasnt screamed. She was so much more confident in the bath knowing it was on, she lay back in the bath and got her hair wet, I put a little shampoo on her head and she rubbed it in on her own and then I rinsed it out with no tears. I definately recommend buying a shield. Perfect. xx

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