I've made the mistake of smacking ds recently, now he's smacking everything and everyone else PLEASE HELP

[santander]

Have totally created this problem, but... I have a ds 2.7 and a dd 16mo. His behaviour is really challenging and since his playgroup broke up he has driven me up the wall. He will not leave his little sister alone to the point where I just have to put her in her high chair for her own safety. His latest fun trick is to climb onto the back of the sofa and jump on her when she is on the floor. Or sit on her head. Or taunt the dog to dangerous levels... I have to have eyes in the back of my head and once or twice I have smacked his legs or bottom :( I does nothing to stop him he just frowns or even laughs... The naughty step is just a game :( Each time I have smacked him I have cried on and off all day it has been a total waste of time but now to make things worse he has started hitting everthing that gets in his way, the dog, me, little sister etc I feel so stupid WHAT DO I DO????? we say 'you musn't hit' DUHHH??? how confusing is that for him??? But what else can I do? Have I ruined everything?? please someone who has been in this situation help me or give me some advice? This is by no means constant but enough to have me worried :(

anyone?

Poor you. Almost 3 year olds are not an easy lot! If it makes you feel any better my DS is the same age and he along with all his girl and boy friends are all being very hard work at the moment. Does he have much day sleep? Do you have a routine, get out and about much? Clear rules, time out in bedroom may help. LOTS of praise and rewards. What have you tried so far?

To be honest, he sounds a bit bored as the play group has finished. Does it start again next week? What's his behaviour like outside of the house?

Yes, hes very bored. The playgroup starts on the 6th. He doesn't really have a nap anymore unless its 40 winks in the car. Consequently by evening he has grown horns :(

I try to do as much as possible with him but to be honest even strapping him into his car seat fills me with dread :(

Do you think I have hurt him emotionally?

Aw don't be too hard on yourself 2.5yr olds can be utter nightmares challenging.

OK, now you know no more smacking. In a couple of months he will have forgotten about it. Each time he smacks say no and remove him for whoever he is smacking and then give the smackee a tonne of attention. He will soon learn that he gets no attention from this behaviour and that it even back fires.

The one thing I have learned from the terrible twos is that their behaviour is often worse if they are not getting enough positive attention. Any chance DP/grandma/friend could have your baby for a couple of hours so you can have some proper mummy time with him and do something fun?

Also repeat the mantra -"this is just a phase".

If all else fails there is always gin.

You haven't ruined anything, he's 2.7, that is pretty standard behaviour :) Its fun isn't it?

It really depends on how verbal he is and what his level of understanding is as to what the best "consequence" would be.

Naughty step is good but you have to do it properly, check the supernanny website if that is the route you prefer.

Telling him it makes mummy very sad when he does xyz.

Remeber its his behaviour that is naughty - never tell him he is naughty - self fulfilling prophesy there!

Try to remember that most of what he's doing is to get your attention. sorry got to run, lo waking up.

good luck

Sounds like he could do with a nap too? Do you think he would go down for an hour after lunch? Great advice above.