16 month old hitting - how do I handle it?

[Bicnod]

My 16 month old DS has started hitting people (adults and other babies) and I'm not sure how to handle it.

I tell him 'no' in a firm voice whenever he does it and tell him 'don't hit, it hurts'.

Is this a normal stage in development? Am I saying/doing the right things?

Also, he has started hitting his own head sometimes - again, is this normal? I think he does this when his teeth are hurting but not sure.

Feeling a bit worried about it and thought MN must have the answer.

TIA :)

Many children do go through hitting phases.
It's common at your DS's age. They can't communicate properly through speech yet, but they have strong ideas and are learning about possession, sharing etc. It's a pretty frustrating age to be.

What you're doing is right, but there are other things you can try.
One is to take away a toy every time he hits. Most children soon learn that it's not worth continuing.
Another is that you can pick him up and put him in the corner of the room facing the wall. This separates him from the object of his aggression and also separates him from you and the other good things in the room. This emphasises your 'no' and tells him more strongly that he is doing something wrong.
You could try a naughty step if appropriate too.

He will grow out of it. Don't worry.

I'm afraid I don't really have any experience of children hitting themselves. I'm sure someone else will advise about that.

Mine does this too, he is 16-months. He is just finishing the biting mummy phase. He went through head banging last month. I think its just another phase like the throwing his whole body backwards, he soon learnt it hurt when mum didn't catch him!
There is a boy we play with, the same age, who is gong through the same age, I think they are going to fight, wrestle and learn quickly together.
I do say 'no' but I try not to focus on it really, ignoring the biting helped to stop that.

Thanks both - glad to hear it is normal and that hopefully he'll grow out of it.

Ruth if he carries on doing it I might try the wall thing - makes sense to emphasize the no a bit more I think.

Turtle - my boy does the throwing himself backwards thing as well - what is that about?! He gets so distraught about things. He's still quite easily distracted so when he's working himself up I pick him up and show him next door's cat or something, but I'm worried that this is the start of the tantrum years and that I should be doing something other than just distracting him. Argh! It's a minefield.

All normal development and the hitting himself. My dd is 15 months and it is such a frustrating age. She sees my ds doing all sorts and wants to do tje same but can't. She hits ds mainly and me when I say no. I tell her firmly no and she give me a snooty look and hits me again. Then I put her down or walk away from her. Believe me a 2 year old is much easier than this age!!!!

Thanks CharlieBoo - that makes me feel better as I assumed it would get harder and harder! how long does the hitting stage last in your experience?

My ds used to hit himself infrustration, as soon as hecould talk and he became more independent the happier he was. He was an angel at 2-3 but between 1-2 was hard and I am finding this too with dd. It passes and once they can talk I found it got easier, but then they don't stop talking lol!!!

Thanks Charlie - you've given me hope :)

I've got this problem with DD who is 15 months. But the big issue is that she is hitting the poor cat. I've tried 'NO', the corner and putting her in her cot for time out. She just laughs whatever I do.

Any suggestions, other than perseverance?

Glad things may improve though.

Yes, DS laughs as well. Or else he imitates me and says 'no, no, no' in a stern voice. It's very very hard not to laugh when he's doing this.

Poor cat. I obviously can't give you any advice but at least you know other people are dealing with the same issue. Wish they came with a manual sometimes.

Thanks Bicnod, it does help to know she is normal. The thing is she adores the cat- she tries to give her dummies, bottles or biscuits as well. It's quite exhausting keeping them apart but the cat has been wonderful so far.