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Behaviour/development

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Ok... so bribery won't work, threats don't work...

2 replies

wahwahwah · 24/08/2010 16:46

...how do I get DS to do anything?

It has always been quite difficult to get DS to do anything doesn't want to do. We have tried to be consistent (following though with rewards and punishments) but he is a stubborn litle bugger and it's not getting easier. He can 'debate' on any subject until he is blue in the face, and is the most pig-headed person I have ever met. He is 6!

Today was a classic. He is swimming now and has classes over the summer. He can do about 10m front and back, float, jump into shallow end, go under water (very happy to do that, so not scared of the water) but will he venture into the deep end? No. He screams, yells, cries, argues, debates, tries to negotiate... This is after a long lecture by me and dad about how he has to do this, and how there will be a reward for getting his swimming badge (he needs to get into the bloody deep end to get his badge) and he seemed to be ok with it. Then even before the teacher told him to go to the deep end, he starts yelling 'no, I hate the deep end, I hate swimming!'. He is not scared of the water. He can swim. He knows that the teacher is beside him and there are lifeguards. I have never seen a child argue as much as him. Arghhhh!

Not sure what to do with him. Cadjoling -doesn't work, bribary doesn't work, yelling doesn't work, scary-mummy-face doesn't work. And he is like this with everything - homework, classes...

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
SoupDragon · 24/08/2010 16:55

WRT the deep end, leave him be.
If he doesn't get his badge so what? he is the one who loses out.

DS2 (9) is similar. I now pretty much leave him be to face the consequences. i point out what the consequences will be if he doesn't do something and thats it. Even homework (with the full consent of his teacher i hasten to add!). i try to say "do this or this will happen" and leave it at that, with a few reminders. Far less stressful.

SoupDragon · 24/08/2010 16:56

Obviously there are occasions where this isn't an option and where he HAS to do what i want him to but they are rare.

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