Over protective mother

[burtie2u]

I don't know if this is the right place to post, but I am really struggling not to be too over protective with my DS 22m. He has gone off with his childminder today to the zoo. I nearly didn't let him go just in case anything happens...ie coach ride, crowds....etc.
I don't know if it's because we had 3 years of fertility to get him, but I find myself just wanting to wrap him up in cotton wool. My parents keep telling me he's a very confident child and if I keep too tight a reign on him, it might knock his confidence.
I'm a really confident person and I have held it all in today when I left him, I know he will have a really good time with all his friends etc. But I am just trying to keep busy at work Is this normal? I don't collect him till 6.30pm It's going to be a long day.

Perfectly normal. Just keep a check on yourself and keep yourself busy, it's all you can do.

I can so sympathise.

DS is 3 now and I am still a bit like this. I especially hate him going in the car with anyone other than myself or his Dad. His Grandma took him out for the day on the train a few weeks ago and he had a ball - but I was completely sick with worry about him running and tripping on the platform and things :(

I think keeping yourself busy and trying to be rational about it is all you can do. It does get easier - a bit - with time. :)

I'm not sure it's that normal TBH. I would think it's usual to have moments when you think the "what if?"s and feel a little panic, but being wound up all day because he's gone to the zoo seems a bit more than that.

It's great that you let him go though, it wouldn't be fair if you let your anxieties take over his life.

It doesn't sound like you normally have problems with anxiety. Have you spoken to anyone professionally about this?

I think it's absolutely normal to be so worried about your first child at such a young age(and a child that you had to wait for, by the sound of it), but - assuming you have confidence in his childminder - you are doing the right thing in letting him go. Well done on not letting him see how anxious you were when you left him this morning. You are being a good mum by letting him do something he'll enjoy and not transferring your anxieties to him.

It does get easier with time. I used to wonder how on earth I would ever let my eldest go on school trips, but I don't think twice about it now. I have a lovely childminder for my second and I am more than happy for her to take him out because I know she'll look after him really well and he will have a lovely time.

Could you ring or text the childminder later this morning to check that all is well? That might reassure you.