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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Ditching the dummies - do both DS at the same time?

20 replies

sam456 · 13/08/2010 09:26

DS1 is 3.4 and DS2 22 months. Both have dummies at night. DS1 would have it all day every day given the chance, DS2 is happy to have it only for sleep. I need to get rid of it for both of them and am thinking I may as well just go for it and go cold turkey with them both at the same time. Anyone else done both kids at the same time?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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TonariNoTotoro · 13/08/2010 09:30

Hmm... I would get rid of DS1's during the day first (if you haven't done so already) and concentrate on that, but yes - when you decide to get rid, do them both at the same time. It will be one horrible week, and then it'll be done with.

I saw something on a sleep training programme about posting the dummy's in the postbox, and then a parcel arriving the next morning with a present - might help?

ppeatfruit · 13/08/2010 09:41

IMO you are being unfeeling how would you like yr cup of tea or glass of wine just removed? DCs have feelings too. What's wrong with keeping the dummies at bedtime?

IMoveTheStars · 13/08/2010 10:08

ppeat - she asked for advice on giving up the dummies, not whether you approved of it or not.

Judgy much?

sparkle1977 · 13/08/2010 11:36

Yes I would do both DCs at once.

I also have 2 DSs and took both of their dummies away (day and night) at the same time and it was fine. They were around 1.5 and 3.2 in age when we did it so a bit younger than yours.

We did the dummy fairy thing where we took dummies and the next morning a toy they wanted appeared. Haven't looked back since.

ppeatfruit - if I didn't take my DCs dummies away they would still have them at secondary school if they could! Its a necessary thing to do at some stage IMO.

Original poster

sam456 · 13/08/2010 13:18

I have already stopped DS1 from having it during the day, a few days of whining but he got over it. Still asks for it now and then but he knows the answer before he asks the question! Will try the dummy fairy and go cold turkey with both.
ppeatfruit - whats wrong with keeping dummies at bedtime? I think we know the answer to that, they need to give them up at some point and do not look like doing it of their own accord.

OP posts:

ppeatfruit · 13/08/2010 14:56

What would you do if they sucked their thumbs ?They're only little it's normal for them to suck something for comfort. Stops crying etc. easier for you?

IMoveTheStars · 13/08/2010 15:26

I gave a dummy so that DS wouldn't get into the habit of sucking his thumb, and I'm intending to take it away from him now as it's affecting his teeth.

I suppose you think it's OK for children to still have dummies when they go to school then, as it's cruel to take them away?

ppeatfruit · 13/08/2010 17:22

No of course not they just drop them naturally. we're talking a 22month old and 3 and half yr old FGS. at nights.

IMoveTheStars · 13/08/2010 17:30

Hahaaa.. Ok then.. how on earth do they drop them naturally? (no really, I'd love to know)

I need to get on and do it (DS is 3 in November) as it's affecting his teeth. He's not a baby anymore and doesn't need his dummies.

Original poster

sam456 · 13/08/2010 17:40

I would also like to know when to expect them to drop them naturally. I would much rather that than have sleepless nights because I've taken them away. I have read threads on here where children still have dummies aged 4+ and so are obviously at school and have not dropped them 'naturally'(not judging those aged 4+ who still have them BTW, I know how attached they get to them - and that I suppose is my point..??)

OP posts:

IMoveTheStars · 13/08/2010 17:48

thanks Sam, that's what I meant to say (in a much less arsey way )

mummytowillow · 13/08/2010 21:26

Do both I say, this is what I did for my DD who was about 2.9 at the time!

She is Thomas the Tank Engine mad, so for a few days before I made a big fuss about the Fat Controller coming to take her dummies to the babies who need them, she fell for it completely, I chose a Saturday night, told her she could go to bed with her dummy, but when she woke up the FC would have been for it and taken it away. So I got her to put all her spare dummies in a bag, hung them on the door, told her FC would leave her a present for her dummies! Next morning she woke up and was amazed he had been!!

She cried that afternoon for about 20 minutes for her dummy and has never asked for it again!! Worth a try!

You do have to go completely over the top though!!

ppeatfruit · 14/08/2010 07:06

Do dummies affect teeth? My Dcs sucked thumbs I thought dummies were softer, unlike thumbs. I'm not suggesting walking around all day with a dummy!!just for bed What's the problem?

SharonGless · 14/08/2010 07:40

I did the dummy fairy thing with my DS when he was 3.4 as he was desperate for the Mr Men books. We built up to it for a few days and then I just did it. He did ask for them a couple of times and i said that he could have them but he would have to give his books back - didn't bother again.

DD is 2.4 now and loves her dummies but will probably try at Xmas with her as there isn't anything she would want instead.

A friend did it with a local independent toy shop where they took the dummies with them, children chose a toy and they handed over the dummies as "payment" which were then sent to the new babies.

IMoveTheStars · 14/08/2010 08:24

ppeatfruit - yes, they affect teeth.DS's are starting to stick out, and he only has it at night time.

Believe me, we get that you don't see the problem.

IMoveTheStars · 14/08/2010 08:47

ppeat - from the British Dental Association
(I've copied it in as the text is miniscule)

"Many parents use a dummy as a way of comforting their baby, especially if you're trying to get him or her off to sleep. Limited use of dummies is fine, but if your child sucks on a dummy for long periods, it could cause problems in the way the teeth develop. The same is true if your baby sucks his or her thumb. The pressure of the thumb or dummy against the back of the teeth could push them forward, which may mean your child will need corrective treatment - like a brace or having teeth removed - later on."

SrStanislaus · 14/08/2010 08:49

When my DTs were exactly 1 year old we went for a weekend away with DD1. We left my 16 year old sister to look after the babies and off we went for three days of hell in a tent a nice break.

When we came back the DTs were having afternoon nap and when I went to get them up I couldn't find their dummies. I asked DSis where they were and she said " What Dummies?"

Turned out they hadnt had the dummies , didnt cry over much and were easily soothed to sleep without them. They never sucked their thumbs either.

I recommend this method

Original poster

sam456 · 14/08/2010 09:14

SrStanislaus - I LOVE your method. Will book sister in for a weekend of babysitting and chuck dummies as we walk out the door on our way to swish hotel :o!!

OP posts:

ppeatfruit · 14/08/2010 10:26

Weird though you may all think this is both of my Dcs who sucked thumbs have straight teeth Ds didn't suck anything he had sticky out adult teeth and orthodontic treatment.IMO it's genetic.

IMoveTheStars · 14/08/2010 11:05

That's it ppeat, disagree with the BMA

Anyway, this isn't helpful to the OP, so I shall respond to you no longer.

OP good luck with it, let us know how you get on. You've reminded me t:)hat I need to get on with this.

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