Would you be concerned

[yawningmonster]

My boy has been late developing right throughout, he is now almost 1, he has no words, he can sit up unsupported but cant get there himself, cant pull up, cant cruise, cant crawl, doesnt roll (though he used to be able to). He has a very poor apetite and gets sick alot, doctor and paediatrition keep brushing us off saying will reassess in 6-8weeks. I have seen other mums say similar things, how have things turned out for you?

he seems to have no real connection to what we are telling him, eg Do you want to get up? he doesnt "talk" or put his hands up etc. He has in the last couple of days twigged that he can let go of things on purpose.

I am no expert and have no experience, just saw this go unanswered and wanted to offer my support.
A friend of mine has a DD, now 3, who had to pester and pester GP and consultants to do test after test. She was convinced that something was not quite right as development was so slow - did all the tests and found nothing. She is still physically behind the others but is getting there in her own timeframe and catching up now - didn?t walk properly until 18m+

Not talking is ok - if you are talking about real words - do you mean absolutely no sound or that he doesn?t seem to understand. 1 yr is still young to expect him to signal yes or no to a verbal question. Sure, a lot of children crawl, even walk by now but there are plenty that don?t crawl and go straight to walking later. Not trying to fob off your concerns, just that there are others out there in similar place and whose children develop these skills a little later with no problems.
However, I believe that as parents we often have a gut instinct that is worth following through with, If you are unhappy, can you get a second opinion?

thanks so much for your replies, we did seek a second opinion by going to a paediatritian after docter fobbed me off. THere is a gut feeling dragging at me and he is such an unsettled little boy I cant help thinking something must be wrong but I think the medicos think I am barmy.

I really hope someone can come on here and give you some proper advice
Personally, if it were me and I felt really sure that something jsut wasn?t quite right, I would keep pestering, trying different routes with hv, diet, baby massage to relax and calm him, different stimulus such as baby music groups, baby gym, lots of eye contact, talking to him, singing, reading etc and monitor his progress carefully. But I bet you are doing all of that sort of thing already.

If that was your first appt with paediatrician, maybe they have to let a time lapse in order to complete an assessment and see the rate of progress for themselves?

Hi YM, I'm no expert either and agree that if you are worried you shouldn't give up until you are satisfied with an answer. However, 6 months is a wonderful think - for example, my son was two, chatted away in his own language only I could understand. We saw a speech therapist who wasn't concerned. After six months of my own intensive attention IYKWIM he was talking beautifully. I alway looked him straight in the face when I spoke and made eye contact etc so he finally caught up.

It might be that simple for you, or it might not, but mothers do know best, follow your instincts.

And they do all progress at different rates.

Hope this helps.

wonderful thing.... not think!!!

thanks we do keep nagging and nagging anyone vaguely professional that we come across, they all just say it is too early to tell we will monitor him abit longer and appear to roll their eyes with that "some mothers" look iykwim. He does babble basketcase but no mama or dada generally limited to bababababa and occasionally blablabla. Doing the toddler meets, music groups, daily activities and excercises with him and try to be fun and upbeat and give him lots of encouragement and eye contact and I do lots of mimicing of what he is doing and running commentary stuff, just feel as though we are in limbo not knowing what is ahead of us iykwim very scary.

Sounds like you are doing everything you possibly can yourself and trying to involve the "proffessionals" so I can understand your frustration and worry. As frustrating and worrying as it must be, perhaps they are right when they say that you need to leave some more time to pass and reassess in a short while? In your shoes I would want a diagnosis/black and white opinion today and deal with it but it sounds like they need time and a logged progress record so that they can assess him fully.
Perhaps the best thing to do would be to keep up everything you are doing, enjoy being with him and celebrate what he can do now, encourage him to learn new things and concentrate on the positve. Maybe keep a record of exactly when he learns new skills to help build a picture of timescale for them. Then, after 6 weeks if no appt. has come through, phone them again?

He sounds alright to me but keep in the system and on top of the appt dates if you feel you should. My DD didn't walk until 19 months and as for speaking, she was at least 2 before she said anything resembling a word. Have you tried babysigning? That might be a way to "work" on communication and catch his attention.

YM, my dd is almost 1 too. She's never been very mobile, could sit up unaided at 8-9 months, was very uncomfortable lying on her front for a long time and rolled over quite late too. But in a matter of 2 or 3 weeks she's mastered the art of sitting up from a lying position and back and has started pulling herself up. She now loves standing and takes the occasional steps. What I'm saying is that just as they have growth spurts they have developmental ones.
As for language, my dd can respond to simple requests like 'give to mummy' or 'throw the ball'. But at her age I'm not expecting any words from her, way too early.
Just giving you all this info as a reference point, since your boy is the same age.

I've been looking at a few sites to check milestones and a lot of them vary depending on what site you look at. I had always thought that walking by a year was a given, but the NCT site says 14-15 months is more normal.

Your baby sounds like many of the babies I know at a similar age. I certainly wouldn't worry about the talking as long as your baby makes some sounds I wouldn't worry yet.

However, if you really think something is wrong, persevere with your doctor/HV/paed. I had a series of appts with my surgery after my daughter started at nursery (had UTI (not contagious, just coincidence), ear infection, conjunctivitis, chest infection) and saw 'anxious mother' on the computer notes during one visit. I was shocked. My child was genuinely ill (she is on antibiotics long-term now), but I was being labelled as 'anxious' like some neurotic. So basically my message is don't let the medical profession get you down. They are there to serve you!

I urge you to trust your instinct and keep asking for referrals to a paediatric consultant - use your health visitor to refer as these things will flag up at 18 mth development checks. Take him in regularly to be weighed and ask every time, get the hv on side and your gp will soon be referring you on...
Where are you based? in one or two areas there are a few excellent consultants who take private patients and this might be an option you could consider.
Specifically I'm thinking of a superb one I know in the south...

ajmum, yes 15 mo is the average for walking (ie plenty of babies are a lot later).
The range for this is 9mo to 20mo for NT children.
But ym, I agree with others, if you are concerned, stay aware of the issue and keep pestering for opinions as yr ds gets older.

I'm not sure you can win. My DD is being referred for hearing tests because she doesn't say anything - she's 18 months and should have 6 - 20 words by now apparently. I was quite relaxed, but people started going on about it, so I took her to the HV and now I feel like I've been too blase. I have a four year old as well, and can't remember when he started doing things. I wouldn't worry about the talking yet!

I'm the same bbs. I took DD to the GP as she is quite "grunty" and got referred to ENT only to find, to my great surprise, that she has glue ear and one ear was getting NOTHING! I wasn't too worried as she communicates, although her talking was definitely lateish. So no harm in keeping on top of things and making sure you don't slip through the net. I don't think I'd go to the lengths of seeing a private Paediatrician yet though.

I wouldn't want to say don't worry, I'm a born worrier! My son is nearly 17mths. He never crawled, shuffled along or anything like that. Once he turned 1 he was walking along with both hands being held but you would have to put him on his feet, a month or so later we were down to 1 hand being held and he can now walk unaided but only if he's heading towards me or his dad! He's only been pulling himself up for a few weeks too. Also, he's babbled for ages but has no specific words yet just talks a load of jibberish! My HV tells me he's a month or 2 behind in the walking and talking dept and to keep up the encouragement but he's perfectly normal. Hope that helps a bit.

thanks everyone I am feeling a bit better about it now, it is just that you read "babies develop at different rates, there is only cause for concern when a baby is consistently behind others in several areas" which he does seem to be. Hard not to worry but will keep raising it when I see gp, hv, paediatritian etc, we are lucky enough to have med insurance so no problems seeing private paeds, this whole lets just wait and see thing is what really gets me, "it may or may not be indicative of a learning and or physical disability time will tell" how is that supposed to make you feel?

Hello Yawningmonster. I found your thread in the archive, your DS sounds identical to mine on the motor skill side of things (DS is 11 months now), except that mine has a normal appetite.
I hope you don't mind me asking how things have progressed with you in the last few months?
My DS has been assessed and I've been told he is about 3 months behind. THANKS!