My dd is usually very well-behaved, and I've never really had any behaviour from her that I haven't been able to handle. But she's recently started having dreadful screaming and crying fits whenever things go wrong, or she can't do something she wants to do. It's sheer frustration, I'm sure, but I don't really know how to stop it.
As an example, another MNer came round this afternoon to pick up a swing and a slide, and dd wanted to help load it into the car. She took one piece, and I realised she hadn't got anything on her feet. She ran inside to get some shoes, and I said not to worry, there were only a few pieces left. The next thing I hear is a scream fit to wake the dead - I thought she'd hurt herself, she was screaming and so upset that she was incoherent. Turns out it was because she had wanted to help, and she hadn't been able to. It took nearly an hour before she was back to normal again.
It isn't happening all the time; I'm still able to say "no" to things that she wants but I don't want her to have, but these tantrums are happening whenever she gets frustrated by things, whenever she can't manage to do things for herself, or whenever she thinks she's being treated unfairly. My usual reaction to behaviour I don't want to encourage is either to ignore it or, if that's not appropriate, she has "time out" either on the bottom step or in her bedroom, but neither really seems to be working here and I'm having to really struggle to keep calm myself when this starts.
I know it's just a phase; I know she'll grow out of it (or at least I hope so!) but I'm at a loss on how to deal with it at the moment. Any tips or tricks I could try would be gratefully received!