terrible 2s at 18 months?!?!?

[stinkypants]

son is 18 months old... but he seems already to be in the terrible 2s!!
i know from reading on here that i should try not to tackle evetything at once but i am not sure really where to start:

• he throws things at me (and his dad sometimes)
• he deliberately puts small items in his mouth to get a reaction from us

-he sits down when we are walking along if he doesn't want to go there -he screams and has a tantrum if we try to stop him doing what he wants to do

• whinging generally, eg to be picked up

i know that we shoudl ignore some things and praise when he's good - but often it is dangerous, eg the throwing / putting in mouth so i end up telling himn off which either makes him laugh or has no impact. i then remove him from the situation and distract him, but he will do it again as soon as he thinks of it or gets a chance.
any help / ideas as am despairing!!
thank you

I can beat that! ours has come at 15 months!! She bangs on the TV but laughs when we tell her off or say no. throws tantrums (thankfully am finding her mini frustration tantrums quite amusing at the mo) but has over the last few days taken to screaming when we - 1) try to change her nappy 2) Put her into the bath (She used to love it and would play and splash for ages)and 3) When we try to put her to bed (being firm with the bed thing and it seems to be working but my lord it is hard!!)

But all of the above taken into acount - I love her so much I ache! She makes me laugh everyday, and I know it could be much much worse so am thankful for small mercys. When he finally goes to sleep can I suggest just taking a few quiet moments to calm down and to really look at him. Most of the frustration just seems to melt away in those few moments - well until the next time!

FWIW this is how I would handle it

• he throws things at me (and his dad sometimes)

DD did this for attention at about the same age, usually when I was on the phone. I ignored it and when I got off the phone I did something to distract her. She gave up on it pretty quickly.

• he deliberately puts small items in his mouth to get a reaction from us

Erm, remove the small items from his reach? If he does get hold of them take them out of his mouth and carry on.

-he sits down when we are walking along if he doesn't want to go there

Pick him up and tuck him under your arm, he'll soon get the message that you are going anyway.

-he screams and has a tantrum if we try to stop him doing what he wants to do

Let him. My DC learnt pretty quickly that you don't get what you want in this life by screaming.

• whinging generally, eg to be picked up

He could be just tired.

every one of the points you've mentioned i am going through, in fact most of these i had today!

with putting the small items in his mouth, why dont you try saying "ta" and hold your hand out, after a while he'l figure out that you want it and might give you it.

as for the rest, if you find an answer be sure to let me know!

i found they are worse @ that age than 2!

thank you all - some great tips. i also love him completely and utterly and cannot believe how lucky i am, it's just the hard work of it all sometimes espec with number 2 due in a few weeks!!
he sleeps brilliantly and never makes a fuss about beditme so thats a mercy.
the small things are most often pebbles in the garden, bit difficult to avoid them really - if i say ta and hold hand out he will sometimes give to me and i can distract and praise with other things quite often - so maybe not as bad as i think - he is often worse when we have visitors and i am just beginning to realise that he just wanst my attenetion!!!
the picking up and carrying is getting hard now as i am so huge - but yes you are right about not giving in to his demands - he certainly knows his tantrums dont work, but i think the frustration gets the better of him at times.
thanks - am feeling a lot morepositive about it today !

Sounds like a very lovely and completely normal little boy.

Good luck with DC2