best way to deal with violent 5yr old?

[misdee]

dd1 behaviour is out of control lately. she has seriosuly hurt dd2 several times over the last few weeks, she is cheeky, disobidiant and worryingly very violent. i witnessed her i nthe garden today pushing dd2 over (very easy to do as dd2 balence isnt very good still) kicking her in the back and stomache and as i got to the gardem also in the head. she refused to go to her room for time out, i had to drag her i nthere and hold the door shut. the other day she kciekd dd2 off the sofa so hard that dd2 cried (dd2 never cries!!) and bruised dd2 hip. we went down the shops today and she was smacking me 0on the bum and wouldnt behave. she is driving me mad. PIL thinks that dd1 can do no wrong, and tbh she gets away with murder there and dd2 gets the blame for everything. they are not helping the situation.

Could it all be linked to Daddy being in hospital? Children show their emotions in funny ways!

thats what i thought, but how do i deal with it?

Not sure really misdee. I suppose you have to try and enable her to talk about her feelings. Maybe draw a picture or something?

could be the hols too Misdee, dd1 is the same here atm, driving me mad!!

hey misdee! Have been suffering that myself. DD has been quite vicious to my DS right from the get go. (When my DD first attempted to scratch DS's eye out he was just 3 weeks old, and all because id asked her to put her shoes on, whilst i was putting his shoes on - she leapt across the front of me into his car seat and just grabbed at his face with such a look of spite on her face. All i could see was blood for a minute - i didnt know what damage she had done and his tears diluted the blood more to make it look worse. It really upset and hurt me) But everyone (gps etc) thinks she can do no wrong. Worst was the other day when, out of my sight for just 30 seconds she forcefed him some playdough to keep him quiet. His sudden quietness and the gagging noise is what alerted me. Thank god for baby first aid is all i can say! Anyway it seems like you are dealing with it fine though, and i really do sympathise so just carry on ignoring the bad behaviour etc and consistently punishing for hitting etc - she knows she's doing wrong. With mine i know she has been spoilt too much in everyones effort to not make her feel left out and it has gone too far the other way IYSWIM.