Please tell me that this is as bad as it gets!!!!

[EstroGena]

I am at my end!!!!

3yrs old DD having ferocious tantrums, hitting, kicking, screaming like she is being murdered, testing her authority ALL the time.

1yr old DD with intolerances keeps putting fingers down throat and vomiting when wants out of highchair/pushchair/carseat. Projectile! Also sleeps for about 4 hours per night.

Please tell me that things can only get better! I am struggling now. It is an impossibility just to get us all dressed and out on a morning. I am shaking this morning!!! Cant take much more

I have no idea sorry but that does sound very bad. Do you get any help / a break?

Ikwym about getting out the house - most days it feels to me as I'm getting us ready, one or both of mine are doing things deliberately to set us back!

We do get the odd break where one of my parents will take one of them for a night. We always have one here but thats better than nothing.

My 3yr old was such a wonderful gentle calm childbut has this temper which has come frm nowhere. Just keep thinking i must have done something wrong!!!

I'd suggest removing your 3 year-old from the battlefield when they behave like that. Time out by themselves in a room so that you get a bit of peace and quiet and are able to deal with the younger one. And, because it's probably an attention-seeking behaviour to get you away from the baby, try to make time for your older one to do nice things together... provided the behave, of course.

Enrolling the older one in a nursery for a few mornings a week might also be a way to get some time to yourself.... they quite like mixing with other children the same age and getting rid of some excess energy. If you have a husband/partner ask them to take a week or two off work to help out at home and give you a break. Good luck

It will get better - I think you do need a break though - even a couple of hours without both of them

Poor you - sounds like a nightmare! I would definitely look into nursery for your DD1.

Hi EstroGena

PLEASE READ THIS!

Now, I have only got one 3.5 little girl but let me tell you she is sometimes beyond a handfull.

She can be an angel but when she's not she kicks,bites,hits,jumps on my head, you name it she does it. Anything to cause the most pain it would seem.

My advice is to give her lots of praise and special treats such as her fav choc bar etc but only when she's had a good few hours. But tell her before hand. In the morning tell her that there is going to be a special treat coming if she's a good little girl. Really stick to it though. If she's not good don't give in. It'll take a while but in the end it should work.

It's working most of the time for mine. She goes back every now and then but overall it's better.

Does she watch a lot of T.V?

As for the sleep, i've been there and you just have to tell yourself it will get better and you know it will.

Please get back, if you have the energy!
Suzanne

Ah thanks so much ladies!!! DD1 goes to preschool nursery so I do get some respite but the rest of the time is HELL!!

When she isnt there I try and get out with them as much as possible and we do allsorts of activites at organised events etc so it cant be boredom! I really am at a loss!

She is is like that old saying about "when she is good she is very good and when she is bad she is wicked".

Suzanne- not to be alone is a wonderful feeling- even though I dont wish this on you .

DD2 is constantly abused by her. I try to seperate as much as poss but it isnt always that easy!

LimaCharlie- yum thanks, wine time here is 7pm, nightly!!!!!

xxxx

Hi EstroGena,

Just read my message back and it sounded rather patronising. I'm sure you've tried all that before. I thought just incase you hadn't tried that, it may work.

What is she like at pre school?
x

Not patronising at all hun, happy to receive all advice!!!

i thought she was fine at pre school but they told me last week that "she has a bad temper, not with the staff but with the other children".

I was devastated!!!!

Just one little point, I have found putting a gate on DS's (16mo) room has been brilliant. It is basically there to keep DD (nearly 4yo) out so he can have time to play quietly without being squashed/left with no toys of his own.

It also means I can leave them both safely if I need to.

My DD is high maintenance! Totally immune to all threats bribery authority. It DOES get better. She has recently started playing on her own a bit, actually going in her room for 10-15mins to do her own thing. She actually now has periods in the day when she can be reasoned with! Heaven!

Keep the faith, you are going through a bad patch and it will only get better as they both get older.

thanks!!!!!

you made me feel better, she is controlling the house at the moment as i am terrified of the tantrums. Ruled by a toddler.....Jo Supernanny Frost would make mince meat of me!!!!!!

I am sure it will all get better by the time they are about 6 and 4.

Then it will be lovely ...

Until they are 14 and 12 ...

When it will be worse. Much much much worse.

Oh god! Don't think about when they're that age.

Hope things are a little better for you today. Sleep always helps so hope you got more than 4 hours.

DH had wisdom tooth out yesterday and was like a crying baby all last night! So i was on night duty with both DD's and by some miracle, I got about 6 hours sleep!!!!!!!

feel like a new woman!

DD1 at preschool sponsored walk and DD2 in highchair watching Wayballoo. All is well with the world

Glad to hear you had a night and (so far) day off.

You can never quite believe it when you've had some proper sleep can you. I went through a stage when I was getting about 30 mins and that was usually in the morning just before she woke up. Little one was fast asleep but for some reason I just couldn't settle. That went on for about 3 months. I think it could've damm near killed me if it went on any longer.

Hope you get the same again.

I always promised when I had kids I wouldn't be one of those mothers who spoke about how much sleep they're NOT getting all the time but that lasted all of about 3 days.lol

Take care