3 year old play - do you intervene?

[lecce]

I was just wondering how other people play with their three year olds and to what extent they guide them and intervene in the way they play.

We went to a new playground the other day and it had some ride-on JCBs. Ds1 was thrilled and even though they were slightly too big for him he played on them for the best part of an hour. The playground was huge and we had payed to get in and will not be returning there soon so I wanted to guide him to the other activites, and did in the end, but should I have done so?

I was also worried about the fact that he should be so obsessed with them. No other child in the time we were there stayed on theses trucks anywhere near as long as he did, and most of them were a bit older so theoretically would have been able to concentrate for longer.

DH laughs at me and says I over-think everything and if ds had flitted from one activity to another I would have worried about that too, but I can't help worrying.

Also, do other people have three year-olds that happily get out jig-saws and play with them independently? Ds has never been very interested in them and I have read a few posts lately about people 'loving the jigsaw' stage but ds can't seem to do one unless I am there at his side cheering at every piece he puts in. I hear myself and think it ridiculous and that I am making him a 'praise junkie' but if I don't do it he seems to have an attention span of about 5 seconds and gives up at the slightest difficulty.

He is fantastic in so many ways and very much into role-play and imaginative play, but it all seems to require mine or dh's participation!

I just wanted to hear some other perspectives as dh seems to think I am worrying over nothing.

Just enjoy the fact that he can concentrate so long on something he enjoys. Not all children like puzzles, even adults don't like puzzles!
Just sit back and observe him and intervene if he can't do something or if you can show him a better way of doing something.

That story reminds me of a trip to Legoland. Legoland... Nirvana for kids... acres of fun and frolics to be explored and enjoyed at vast expense. But my train-mad DS found the model village and just wanted to race about watching the various model trains circling the layouts. LOL! I did have to drag him away with bribes of ice-cream to experience the rest of the park eventually.

Don't worry that he just wanted to play on the JCBs. Many boys have an inner Jeremy Clarkson.... But if you're bored standing there watching him do the same thing over and over then it's quite valid to move him onto something else for the sake of your own sanity. As for jigsaws... any kid that loves JCBs is going to find a wooden puzzle rather tame.

I would just let him follow his interests. I'm with your dh - you are worrying unecessarily.

My dd spent a year at nursery, 3 days a week, doing nothing but dressing up and role play. There were opportunities for her to do all sorts of other exciting things, but she just wasn't interested. Her lovely, lovely nursery teacher recognised that this was an important pattern of play that dd was really immersed in and let her get on with it. She just introduced different clothes and props at different times to see whether dd would explore them.

i agree with your dh. you're totally overthinking it
let your ds enjoy his childhood and play with things he likes playing with.
nothing wrong with saying "hey ds, do you want to come and see the big climbing frame over here" or whatever... but if he says no, that's fine!

different children like different stuff. some do jigsaws and some don't... it's nothing to worry about

He sounds a bit like my DD (she's also 3). She has lots of toys, jigsaws, building blocks etc but she really only likes imagining and role play. She can be entertained for quite a while pretending two pens are a mummy and daddy!
If we go to the playground she hardly ever wants to swing or slide or climb. She wants me to pretend the climbing frame is the princess castle or a train going to London.
I do worry too about whether this is normal especially when everyone elses kids are playing in the approved fashion but then I remember that I was just the same as a child.

I took my 3yo DD to an adventure park today with her freind. They had every possible ride/activity available and ended up lining three tatty old garden chairs up and playing being on a bus for ages. We just let them, they were so self absorbed in their little game.

I did a parent craft course once run by the local health visitors, and they said that self absorbed play is really really good, and to just allow her to get on with it without intervening.

I think when they get into something it shows they are using their imagination, and they are enjoying it too.

If you want to know what quality play is have a read of this

www.richlearningopportunities.co.uk/pdf/importance%20of%20play.pdf

Children play in ways which naturally extend their understanding of the world. This could be to flit from one toy to another exploring one aspect of lots of different things or it could be to spend a long time exploring one aspect of one activity. I'd say let him be deeply absorbed but make gentle suggestions which could extend his understanding of the thing he's interested in.