Does your 4yo daughter have a best friend?

[YunoYurbubson]

Mine doesn't and everyone elses seems to.

[not enough to think about today emoticon]

Yes dd always has a best friend although when her first one left nursery she replaced her fairly fast with a new one so I think they're fairly fickle at this age. In some ways I'd prefer her not to have a best friend all the time as they seem to end up playing the same thing all the time rather than having new experiences.

No, mine doesn't. Neither does her 5 year old brother. I ask them who their best friend is every now and again and it changes every time.

Dd2 who is 5 has a best friend unfortunately it's a Great Dane called Elsker, her human friends come and go with her moods.

nearly 5yo DS doesn't, I know that feeling! he doesn't seem to be bothered though!

Yes.. but it can change with the weather

As far as I can see, the 'best friend' thing at this age is a grown-up idea transferred onto children far too young to have a clue. Many times, I've noted it's not even symmetrical (child 1 says x is best friend, child 2 says child 1 4th best or whatever).

I've also noted that one child may select as a best friend someone who just does what she or he says, or can be dominated in some way!

I taught DS to have a number of good friends or several best friends. The ranking thing just leads to tears.

I think it's very important for girls from 6 onwards, but that doesn't mean it's not problematic. It seems to be more like a love affair, with intense bonding followed by cruel dumping or acrimonious fall outs, and then it's all over. So really better to encourage the idea of several equally good friends, despite the gender preference for just 1.

Interesting Aegean.

There are a couple of girls who dd refers to as her "best friend" but I know it isn't reciprocated. In fact, what prompted this OP was coincidentally hearing both other mothers mention something about their dd's "best friend" and both times I thought "oh, bf isn't dd then?" Not that it matters, and I'm not worried or anxious or anything. Just thinking about it.

But then there are a couple of boys who dd plays with often, and who she really likes but would never ever think of as a best friend, because they are boys.

What is special about age 6?

Dd's best friend is still her imaginary friend I think - ties in with her doing whatever dd wants her to do!

DS (6) has a group of friends he is fiercely loyal to, which started at a village music group aged 3 and has expanded a little since Reception. This is ideal, IMO, or it would be if he wasn't being split up from all of them in a different class next year. Still, they have playtimes.......

DD ( 4 on Monday )definitely doesn't have a best friend. A few months ago I asked the helpers at pre school who she played with and they said "whoever's in home corner, she's very sociable".

I really don't like the idea of attaching yourself to one friend, especially at such a young age. Sometimes the DC will ask who my best friend is, and I will say I like to have lots of friends as they all have different qualities I like. DH feels even more strongly about it than me, and actually gets a bit hot under the collar if best friends are mentioned.....