motivating a nine year old who's bored at school

[lucy7]

My 9 year old has been acting up at school. apparently it's been going on a while, so i cant put it down to end of term tiredness etc.
I have talked to my son who says it's because he's bored with what they're teaching him and that he's 'done it all before'. His teachers say that altho he's bright, he's not pulling his weight. They say he's not getting the grades to prove that he should be given more challenging stuff, but surely he's not getting the grades because he's not 'motivated' enough? They cant give me a solution for motivating him. They wont acknowledge that there is a link between him being naughty and not being motivated. They just seem to infer that 'I am not bringing him up well enough'
Can anyone help? If my teachers cant/wont motivate my child, what can I do to help him? Please please...!!!

He's not 'bored' he's lazy. That's what the teachers are telling you. If he's intelligent he should be able to grasp the idea that getting on with the work and reaching the required standard will mean that more challenging work arrives. So support the teaching staff... tell him to pull his finger out, get on with it, and don't accept 'it's boring'. That won't help.

So you take your DS word over that of the teachers who no doubt have seen i all before ? I think you need to work a bit more with the teachers on this and support them because at the moment the message that your DS is getting is that 'Mum thinks I am right so therefore I will get away with it '

Some times kids need a kick up the backside so to speak - have a 9yr old boy myself. epak

Are there any teachers around who have called the child or parent's bluff on this one? and ever been surprised by the child rising to the challenge? or does the child then realise they don't know everything and suddenly stop being "bored"

@choccyp1g... I'm not a teacher but I had a nephew that pulled the 'terribly bright but they're just not stimulating me' con for years (supported by his parents, unfortunately). Even though he actually was an intelligent child, he got so far behind because he'd missed out on so much of the groundwork, that he really found it very difficult to catch up. He soon stopped being 'bored' when he needed remedial lessons.

What are his NC levels like? I presume he's in year 4 - so if his scores are in the high 4s then the school has an issue - if they aren't, then he and you have an issue.

: hormones

my 10yo has recently morphed into this world weary over-sassy mummy-can't-tell-me-anything pre-adolescent

fortunately, he is not terribly academic, so at least can't pull that ruse on anyone

I believe he is primarily motivated at the moment by the thought of lunchtime detentions

oh well, whatever gets us through this phase

but I have good hope that he will eventually mature a little (along the Mark Twain lines: when I was 18, I thought my father knew nothing...)

Thing is, quite a lot of school can be boring whether you're bright, average or struggling with something; 'boring' means different things, including 'done it all already', 'too hard for me to try to understand' and 'it's sunny outside and I'm fed up with being in here'.

My nearly 9 year old often tells me school is boring and we need to sift through to find the message. Some of the boring is 'too much effort' - eg writing a long story. Some of the boring is 'not particularly interesting to me' - eg art, in DS2's case. Some of the boring is, though, 'the teacher takes so long to explain it and I knew it already and then we all have to work through examples as a class and then she explains it again, and by the time we get on to the work, Mummy, I've lost interest'.

For all of these, though, he has to find a way of dealing with it. He needs to find enjoyment in art and to develop his stamina to write long stories. And he needs to get through easy work quickly to get on to the more interesting stuff.

I don't see why in the OP's case, and to Choccyp1g's point, they can't just give him more challenging stuff and see if he copes. It might solve the problem one way or another.

Peer influence can play a part here as well - if he is friendly with a group of less academic "naughty" lads who try to impress each other with how they can write rude words that rhyme with duck and how "boring" they are finding the work they are given etc and how they can make up silly stories for literacy and wind the teacher up, then that's your motivation for you. Are his schoolfriends doing well and working hard or is their influence part of the problem?

Thanks guys. Thing is, we don't encourage our son into thinking he's too bright for school, but I do get the 'laziness' point. ahh, confused!

I have the same experience as others about the wide semantic field covered by the word "boring". I got it a lot from my (admittedly very bright) dd. We kept repeating 'that's as may be, but you still have to do the work, you still have to learn this whether you see its usefulness or not, you still have to listen to the teacher'. With advancing maturity (now Yr 8), she is beginning to see our point. And she has learnt that you can't sit back and rely on other people to motivate you, life just isn't like that.

Now all that remains is for ds to learn the same lesson....

Lucy7 - what did he get in his year 4 optional SATS? If he didn't score high 4s, it might be a bit hard to convince the school that he needs harder work.

I'm not sure...the teachers say that he is not getting the grades to prove to them he can do harder work. I know he's more than capable (we have a tutor who teaches him for an hour as a topup because he had a few supply teachers at the beginning of the year). He says he's doing 11+ stuff with him already. Is it laziness, as everyone seems to be saying here? And how do you motivate a 'lazy' child when you're not there at school to chivvy him along?

I honestly think you need to start with the school. If he's not performing at or above the level he should be, then you haven't much of a leg to stand on about him having harder work. The school should be able to tell you what level he's working at. NC levels are a pretty crude instrument, but they are hard evidence.

And yes, the school should be motivating him, and some teachers are less inspiring than others, but I have seen briliant teachers unable to engage a 9 year old boy who is determined not to be engaged. Sometimes, I'm afraid, it has to be knuckle down or else!

Ok thanks!

The school doesn't seem to keep you very informed if you don't even know his levels. Didn't they say in his school report?

As a trainee teacher: there is a balance needed between challenging a student and it being too hard. If it is too easy or too hard, the student can say it is boring.

However, what you need to ask is: What exactly does he need to do to get the grades to do more challenging work? Does he need to write more? Finish more answers? Write more neatly? Go into greater depth? Think more?
Can they give some indication of what they expect him to achieve, can he self-assess his work to see he has covered ALL the points they are looking for?

It could be a mismatch of expectations. He finishes in 10 minutes, but has not given the detail they are looking for.

Good luck!

Hi Cory
They didnt give me specific grades for anything, but his school report he had was good, all on the third column.

Hi Mummytime
They operate a trafficlight system at our school: green means they've got it and can go ahead, amber means they've nearly got it. They are encouraged to check their work.

Sorry to bang on about levels - but what did he get in Year 2?

Hi Seeker
From what I remember they were in the low 4's. He's coming up to the end of year 4 now

Sorry - he wouldn't have got 4s in year 2 - I think you must be misremembering. Go and talk to the teacher - I don't think there's enough information here for anyone to help constructively.