Do you go by your nn or proper name?

[Bluesunday]

Just curious... both names we've picked out for this baby (don't know the sex yet) are thought of as nicknames. DP is adamant though that we put the full name on the birth certificate incase they want to be bank managers or cabinet ministers when they grow up (God forbid)... anything to shut him up but I personally can't imagine calling the child by either of the proper names. I am very working class, London accent, so it wouldn't sound right for me to call "posh name, come in for your chips!" DP is very middle class, Cheshire accent, so not a problem for him to shout "posh name, do come in for one's roast swan supper, whatwhatwhat". I was just wondering if anyone here was ever given a proper name in addition to their nn but ended up never using the proper name... hope that makes sense..? Isn't it confusing to have two names, with regards to school, bank accounts, qualification certificates etc etc?

Nickname

My sister has always been known as Ellie rather than Elena (apart from a brief period in Y1 when she had 3 other Ellies in her class). She's always down as Elena on official forms but schools always seem to have a box "name child is known by" which mum puts "Ellie" in so never been a problem.

Depends on the name I suppose. DD's proper name is on the forms at the doctors, nursery etc but she is known by her NN only, eg her name thing a nursery has the NN on.

She does not recognise her 'real' name as hers at all, but like your DH I wanted something more grown up she can use if she wants to.

Have had snippy comment from a family friend though, along the lines of, well if you're only going to call her 'NN', you should have named her that. One of those - your baby, your rules things IMHO

I'm sorry but I just don't see the problem.

My name is Alexandra - all my school, banks, qualifications, etc., etc. are in that name. My friends call me Alex - I would never in a million years ask for a bank card in the name of Alex - it's not my name.

Am I missing the point here?

Skihorse - the nn we've picked are quite different from the proper names. Oh God, I'm going to have to say them aren't I (prepares to have choice of names ridiculed):
For a girl it's Betty/Elizabeth
For a boy, Teddy/Edward.
Alex and Alexander at least have the same four letters at the start so they obviously belong to the same person. But in my mind Teddy is a little working class lad and Edward is quite a posh name (to me anyway), they don't sound like the same person to me. This probably makes no sense to anyone but me!

agree with skihorse,

i use my offical name on all legal documentation and nn on all others don't really see the problem unless the nn is quite cutsey and not suitable for an adult.

Sorry - AlexanDRA

But after a certain age they might want to be called Elizabeth/Edward rather than Betty/Teddy.

OP-if you wouldn´t feel "right" saying these names, shouldn´t you look for others?

I love Teddy and Betty, not so crazy about Edward and Elizabeth (DP's choices), but other than Theodore and Bettina can't think of what else goes as a proper name

I know an Edward who is most often referred to as Ted. I also know a Beatrice who is always called Betty. Or there is always Betelguese . Personally I think you should go with a proper name but use the nickname. The child can then choose when older. An NCT friend called her DD Charlie, which is all she is ever known as (my friend is too young to remember the perfume) but her birth certificate is Charlotte.

Betelguese it is!

I am Jessica and get called

Jessica
Jess
Jessie
Je
Je je
JP

They are all me.

Your DP is right, give them the option of a grown ups name if they want it later in life, don't limit them with cutsie names.

Roast swan supper. LOL

"Teddy" conjures up a little upper class boy in a cravat for me!

I would go for a "proper" name with a nn. My dd1 is Katherine but known as Kathy at her own request.

My name is Victoria. My family almost always call me Vic. At school I had the choice of what to call myself, so I chose Vicky (cringe). I am now back to Victoria as I find it a lovely name. My family still call me Vic. That's fine because it's a family thing, if you see what I mean.

Later on, your child will choose for his or herself - but I don't think he or she will want to change what you say, because mums can get away it.

Argh, explained myself very badly there - basically I'd choose a 'longer' version for your child to give him or her choice when older - doesn't mean YOU have to use the long version - I'm sure if you don't your child will find it nice

and LOL @ roast swan supper.

My name is Nicola. Other people call me Nic or nikki which is fine, but I will always introduce myself as Nicola and think of myself as Nicola.

Personally, I'd go with 'proper' names so they have the choice later on.
My ds1 is called Jacob John, so although I will always call him Jacob, later he can have jake, Jay, JJ or anything else he likes.

I think it's nice to have a choice - at school I was always nn to my friends but full name to the teachers and I preferred it that way.

Edward/Ted/Ed IMo is pretty classless - my grandad was Ted and he was vv upper middle (it has dropped off since then in our family). Teddy is a lovely name but if he wants to be Ed later, why not?

i have chosen the twins names because of the nickname.

Harry will have harrison on his B/C
Milly will have emilie on hers

Love the nn but felt they should have full names aswell so they had a choice later on

My DH is 36 and has pretty much always been known by his NN. His father insisted that his "full name" go on his birth certificate, though it was never used for anything other than on official stuff.

That said, in the last 5 or so years, he has started to used his full name for some things on a more personal level. His NN has slightly past its sell by date now to anyone other than family and people who have known him for years - suits a child, a teenager and a younger adult, but not REALLY someone approaching his late 30's.

So, I'd say, put the full name on the birth cert. Use the NN for everything you want to use it for, but at least, in the future, DC can revert to full name if they wish.

It is difficult as everyone has different opinions, but ultimately it is down to you and your DH. FWIW with DD we knew we wanted to call her but decided to give her a longer "proper name". I will admit that it does makes me cringe when I am at the Drs, as I do think it is quite a pretentious name

Overall though I am glad that we did it (I just wish that DH had agreed to the longer name I wanted instead). In your case I would definitely go with the longer names and use the nn's. I love the name Betty but it is one of those "of the moment" names which go in and out of fashion, and she may want to be known as something else at some point.

I actually started a thread about the whole Edward v Ted thing when I was pg as this was the name we were considering should DD have been a DS. Like you I love Ted but am not keen on Edward.

My dd is full name on birth certificate, bank, anything official. Nn to anyone who knows her, she knows herself by her nn, as does nursery, my friends and family. I even introduced her as nn, although people often ask is it short for full name. I love her full name, just love her nn too. And she will have a choice later on.

I don't understand the issue with what jobs our children have later in life, I think that is an outdated idea now if you consider the jobs of...

Nick Clegg
Ed Balls
Ed Milliband...

They seem to have gone the opposite way!

Hmm offended! I am from Cheshire and I don't eat roast swan, we go for roast pheasant instead haha

I use my nickname for everyday but my full name when writing it down. But then that could be because both my nickname and surname have one syllable and sound too harsh when written or said together.

My friend's DD is known as Beth, but her B/C name is Elizabeth, doesn't seem to cause any problems. She is also occasionally Betty, Lizzie, Liz, Ellie, Lily-Bette, (E)Liza.

My DD has a long "proper" name with lots of different shortenings and I like that she can have a cutesy NN now and more adult versions as she chooses/grows up.