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having cross cultural name crisis, please help!

33 replies

AisieSusie · 31/01/2010 16:13

just a month to go til my due date, and NO names on the short list! here is the problem, I need to find a name for a boy that works well in UK [classic brit name?] and in Palestine [arabic names].

I really want a name that sounds familiar and has british/ english connotations, as I love words and meanings and history BUT my DH really wants a name that sounds familiar/ has meaning in palestine.

Its becoming rather an issue as its showing up all sorts of cultural tensions I never knew existed between us, and i had thought that maybe naming him something that didn't sound too 'christian' would be enough, and follow up with a arabic second name, esp. because its already palestinian tradition that one of the second names is his fathers, but my DH is adamant that the baby must have a name that sounds/ is arabic so his side of the family feel like the baby is part of them, and also so the baby doesn't feel like a foreigner when he visits palestine.

[tbh this last point is a bit academic given how unstable the region is, visiting a war zone isn't exactly likely to happen soon]

and just to balance the needs of this name... i don't want my baby's name to sound alien to me either, and my parents are getting really upset as they feel any non-brit name is some kind of exclusion for them...

so in short, I need to get this whole name issue dealt with before it becomes a divisive and political/ racial nightmare for me, husband and our families - as these things escalate so quickly!

Reluctantly I do agree that a child should have one name and one identity, particularly important not to feel like he has to chose between 2 cultures and 2 self identities... especially given the tensions between our two countries... but this is nigh on impossible! NB reluctant as i can't find any names that do this, not cos i am mean or anything.

so here's the challenge, do any of you lovely people know names that could work across the brit/arabic cultures [and sound nice!]?

OP posts:
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FreakoidOrganisoid · 31/01/2010 16:26

Ummm

Do any of the Aadam, Aaron, Sami, Rafi type names work?

twopeople · 31/01/2010 16:46

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AisieSusie · 31/01/2010 16:47

am loving rafi, had suggested this, but got into difficulties as then suggested Rafe/ Ralph as related names that could go on birth certificate, and then call him everyday 'rafi'... DH said no he wants something written that works in arabic too...

i don't know, does Rafi have any brit connotations?

OP posts:
twopeople · 31/01/2010 16:48

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MadamDeathstare · 31/01/2010 16:53

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Missus84 · 31/01/2010 16:59

That's a tough one, much easier for girls!

I second maybe Sami/Samir and using Sam.

Or maybe Joseph/Yusuf?

Zakariah?

Winetimeisfinetime · 31/01/2010 16:59

I had a look on one too, MadamDs and came up with Basil { same in Arabic and English } and Zak { Zakariyya, Zaki or Zakir in Arabic }.

I feel your pain op as my dh is Indian and we had similar problems when naming our ds. Especially as in my dh's culture the mil normally gets to do the naming - we ended up giving him an extra middle name for her as she didn't like the other 2 we had chosen.

mumofsevenplusfour · 31/01/2010 16:59

i know a Yusef half palestinian half irish which seems to work for both sides of the family

FreakoidOrganisoid · 31/01/2010 17:01

I know a couple of British Rafi's, one is Raphael, the other just Rafi.

I like it and even if it's not completely British it is at least easy to pronounce/spell for Brits.

Xavier is nice too, ds was almost Xavier

FreakoidOrganisoid · 31/01/2010 17:04

Oh yes my friend has a Zakariyya, has had a few people spell it Zachariah though and people tend to pronounce it eyeah rather than the arabic eeah

MadamDeathstare · 31/01/2010 17:04

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vess · 31/01/2010 17:07

I know a Sami and a Kenan.

Blu · 31/01/2010 17:09

I would cease all discussion of names with anyone beynd you and DH immediately! It is your decision, no one else's, and time and time again on MN people are grappling with pressure and negative reactions from parents and ILs. Just tel them you will choose something you both like and it will be a lovely surprise for everyone when they meet the baby. Once they have a baby to coo over, the name an any imagined slights or priorities will be forgotten. If they have any sense whatsoever.

My DP comes from a completely differnt racial, national, religious and cultural background to me, and we did manage to find something that sounded great to both of us. In your position, I think I would be quite open to your DH's pov - your baby will grow up here, be a UK child - it's natural that he wants some continuation with his home country. Britain is so multi-cultural these days, as long as you choose something that you like the sound of and is pronouncable here, I wouldn't worry.

Blu · 31/01/2010 17:12

Yusuf and Rafi are gorgeous!

Meid · 31/01/2010 17:16

My son, UK/Arabic mix, is Adam.
We also liked Zain, Zaki and Sammi.

Good luck with your choice!

Blu · 31/01/2010 17:18

Kamal
Jamal
Jamil

Missus84 · 31/01/2010 17:26

Ooh, Zain is good too. It sounds very cool in English.

AisieSusie · 31/01/2010 19:27

thank you for all the suggestions... at the risk of sounding greedy, do you have anymore?!

Its just so hard to find a good name that both of us like, and although I agree we should just pick one we both like and not worry about anything else, my DH is definitely not of the same opinion, so I need a few names up my sleeve to help...

OP posts:
Sariska · 31/01/2010 19:53

I think I know where you're coming from. We wanted to reflect both halves of our ds's identity - and I also felt strongly that asDh's surname clearly flagged the Arabic heritage, I wasn't being unreasonable in wanting a first name that indicated the other side of dc's heritage. We went for Noah / Nuh in the end. Noah is on the birth certificate along with a definitively Arabic middle name. Now expecting dd and have to admit that although she will have an Arabic middle name, we've abandoned the whole crossover first name idea and are going for a European one that we both love. Perhaps not everyone will be pleased but such is life.....

scarletlilybug · 31/01/2010 20:01

Ismael?

mathanxiety · 31/01/2010 20:06

Ashar
Abraham/ Ibrahim
Aslan
Anan
Hari
Ismail
Elyas/ Ilyas
Omar
Omri
Pir
Salem
Ramzy /Ramsay
Tony
Malek/ Malik
Barak
Rabi
Jareh
Jaspar/ Caspar
Yacoub/ Jacob
Jordan
Rafiq
Daoud/ David

Veritythebrave · 31/01/2010 20:09

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strawberrykate · 31/01/2010 20:09

Jed? Ferran?

mumofsevenplusfour · 31/01/2010 20:30

gabriel ?

cityangel · 31/01/2010 21:23

How about:

Amin
Aaron/Aryn
Emir
Faris
Jericho (Jerry)
Kadin/Kaydn/Kaeden/Kaiden
Kale
Lais
Tariq