Why is it so important for our chosen names to be 'original'?

[MrsMerryHenry]

I have only ever met one person who truly had an original name; that's because her parents made it up.

99% of us share a name with lots of other people around the world, and we all know this, don't we? So it baffles me when people get possessive over their chosen names or reject a great name because it's 'popular'. No name is unique! Why do we try to fool ourselves?!

Having an unusual name myself, I made sure that my two DSs' had easy, straight forward, solid names. That said, there is a certain racing car toddler programme now, which means that everyone spells DS2's name wrong. Grrrr. DS1 is a Jack, and is known as Jack C. Didn't think that one through....

I choose names I like regardless of popularity. When DS1 was born there were a lot of raised eyebrows about his name but then a couple of years later it topped the popularity charts! DS2's name has always lurked in the top 50 but I have always loved it. DD's name again was one I loved, didn't realise it was popular but apparently it is, the woman in the bed opposite in hospital called her's the same and I have heard of a fair few since!

I won't use a name a good friend or family has used for their DC as it feels to me that name belongs to that child IYSWIM? Am totally unfussed if someone wants to use one of my children's names for theirs though.

Popularity also does not necessarily mean they will be 'john x' in class, my name topped the list the year I was born but I was the only one in my year at school, there were about 7 Kellys though!

This may sound a bit crap but is everyone not unique regardless of their name?

I wonder whether this 'trend' has something to do with the fact that 'celebrities' call their children unusual names (and IMO ridiculous names).

As someone has already said I am sure most kids will dislike their names as they get older. Is this not part of growing up and developing your own identity.

When people describe you to someone that does not know you and they say your name, they then describe your physical traits or attributes do they not? Eg you know Mary, oh you know the tall lady who has red hair.

seeker and kerala we think on the same wavelength. guess what my DD is called too!

Well I haven't come across any tiny Marys and have met alot of babies over the last few years. Its a gorgeous name. Surely the holy grail is classic and universal but not widely used ie...Mary!

I have a really common name - Clare - and it's not really bothered me, although lots of people spell it the wrong way...

A friend of mine is a speech therapist, she had one class she went into that had three little girls called Unique. I hope they have nice middle names they can use when they are older...

but is Clare a common name? I know 1 adult, and no children at all.

I know lots of adult Clare/Claire's but no little ones.
I know Mary's of all ages inc 10yo and 1yo.
I know no Uniques thankfully!

oh and today I saw a spelling I had never come across today when I was addressing an ebay parcel
Cylena - now that is special unusual

sorry too many todays

Hula: "OP, why wouldn't someone chose a name that is less common and more 'original' than a very common name?" I think you've misunderstood my point, hula - I'm asking why we fool ourselves into thinking that our choice of names should somehow belong to us and us alone, as if we somehow think our chosen names are unique.

I love the fact that so many little girls are being called 'Unique'. Oh, the beautiful irony!

Dweezil and Moon Unit Zappa are the children of that king of the conventional, Frank Zappa. They also have siblings called Ahmet and Diva.

My name is unusual in this country...but I have two cousins in my country of origin who both have the same name (one on each side of the family!). I do find it funny that people on this thread still have such negative memories of sharing their name with other girls at school - for me it was the complete opposite - I wanted to have a boring, English name! But having left school behind aeons ago, the woes of my school years are really not significant enough to affect the way I behave now.

I wouldn't particularly name a child to be unique or even different but I think that fashion has a bearing on what names I like as it does on what clothes/ furniture/ films I like from time to time. There are names that are unusual that are also popular iykwim.

No-one of a parents' generation knows anyone with these names and they become more popular at the same time as everyone is saying 'How unusual!'.

It is true that to be truly unique you would call your child a name from another (now unpopular era say 1980s) but the problem is I just don't like those names and so fashions change...

Unfashionable = unusual but not necessarily nice

Fashionable = appearance of being unusual (for the most part till you reach the Grace/ Rose/ May saturation point)

For me the trick is to find a name that is:

Not made up
Traditional and classic
A little bit different
Pretty (for a girl)
Goes with my surname
Doesn't rhyme with anything rude
Isn't the name of a popular TV/ film character or a song

'Tis a tricky business....

I think that it is possible to give your child a unique name.
Just so long as you make it up and it's not nice enough for anyone to want to copy it.

So unique isn't necessarily what people actually aspire to generally.

Those that do use unique names, really don't care what anyone else thinks anyway, so there's not much point worrying about it.

Yes 'unique' and 'original' names usually are awful.

I agree with fizzpops.

I think the main points in choosing a name are:

1. whether I/dh like it
2. whether it goes with our surname
3. whether it is pronouncable in my families' languages (in my case, German and French) 4)whether the name is 'unique' enough to not result the child be one of 4 Jacks in his class.

So, there is neither a need to make up silly spellings, nor is there a need to pick a top 10/50 name, given that there are 1000s of lovely names to choose from!