Would you call your child a name you don't like so you could use the nn that you did like?

[fizzpops]

Just out of interest, I am not pg or anything?

My DH and I had conversations about names when I was pg with my DD (didn't know we were expecting a girl) and loads of names we liked the shortened version of but not the whole name - Charlie but not Charles etc.

A colleague was horrified that my friend had called her son Jake rather than Jacob and wouldn't accept that I thought it would be strange to give a child a name you really disliked for the sake of the nn that you did.

Am loving Bear/Bartholomew and Coco/Constance.

DD1 has a name on her birth certificate which is shortened by everybody and was a concious decision from day one that the nickname is what she would be known as: nothing wrong with the name itself but it was a compromise name rather than one that either dp or I really loved.

I do think that giving them the full name gives them the chance of choosing for themselves though and dd1 has decided to be her full name at school since beginning secondary.

I must say I think Ben is one of those names that while it is 'officially' a shortening of Benjamin sort of stands alone these days.

Benjamin makes me think of The Graduate.

I think what I struggle with is that although it may be true that once grown a child may like more options I just couldn't call a child a name I didn't like. To me Charles and Charlie are almost different names. One seems quite austere and formal and the other is a nice friendly name and I would expect a Charlie adult or child to be 'fun'. Would possibly be disappointed in many cases.

In the case of snobbery I think a person defines a name and not the other way round. If I met a solicitor called Ted and a plumber called Edward I might think it was unusual but it wouldn't take me long to accept it. Perhaps that means a person's job defines their name... although I think with any preconceptions they are soon forgotten once you have met a person or know more about them.

Coco could also be short for Cordelia.

Love the bear/Batholomew idea.

Prefer Annie as a nn for Annabel. Not wild about Belle. Belle Disnified for me.

I have a Cordelia not that my DH will tolerate the nn Coco

I've done quite a lot of looking back at censuses (sp? sorry if that should have fancy latin ending). Often found name Hannah which I think of as a nice name, is shortened to Fanny. Can't imagine that making a come back.

how do you get coco from cordelia or constance? surely latter would be connie? think it's a bit of a stretch!

No - I'd have to like both names as both would, at some point, be used. Similarly I'd only use a long name where I didn't mind at least one of the nn too.

my kids don't have nicknames at all - not a big fan of them, but they don't have names that are easily shortened either.

also don't get argument that some names look better on certificates etc etc - sheer snobbery I think

ramonaquimby - I freely admit I am a name snob but then I hated mine all my days and wanted my girls to have choices as they grew up

I'm not a fan of nn either. But my sons do have them. They have no connection with their real names. Some started off at secondary school others at sports clubs. Every member of the cricket club as at least 1 nn. eg Kipper (the one who eats all the cakes...Mr Kippling!) They do stick unfortunately!

I am one who prefers full names on certificates. I'm not a snob. Bit old fashioned mybe but never a snob!

Yes, I have done

My second daughter has a name that many on here consider to be a nickname, we love her name but didn't like any of the longer versions of it.

We got around the 'problem' by giving her a longer more formal middle name which I love.

lockets do you not have them framed and up on the wall?!?!?

Sorry, mis-read the OP. NO, I wouldn't, should have been my answer

Another 'formal names for formal purposes like birth certificates' poster here. No, I wouldn't give a child a proper name I disliked just so we could use the nickname. So Charles would be out, even if I liked Charlie.

Ds has a name that really doesn't lend itself to nicknames - never heard of one and it's only two syllables and four letters. Dh and I both have monosyllabic four-letter names (just a coincidence) and don't have nicknames. I had one at school related to my surname that was a bit tiresome.

No doubt at some point his peer group will come up with a completely unrelated nickname anyway!

ramonaquimby- maybe it is because I know of a Constance shortened to Cookie, that I would feel comfortable shortening it to Coco. However, I dislike the name Connie, so perhaps that will put me off choosing Constance anyway!

Not snobbery at all. It's about keeping your child's options open a little over the next 7 or 8 decades. 4 of them you yourself might be dead, but it'd be nice to know that if Margot becomes the next Sharon or Tracy (or in any way becomes a disadvantage then 'Margot' could become Maggie without any legal problems).

NOT snobbery. It's about handing back some control to your child. IMO.

No, in answer to the OP. No matter how much I liked the nn,I wouldn't use it if I didn't like the long version. But then I've never found a nn I like where I didn't like the full version.

My DDs are Elizabeth and Katherine. I did chose Elizabeth specifically because I wanted to call her Lizzie but I do like E nevertheless. I think I prefer Catherine with a C but I wanted to call her Kitty and thought it may as well start with the same letter. DS has a very traditional name too. Most friends think we're very boring in our choice. They're probably right!

I also wouldn't use a nickname rather than the long name, for many of the same reasons as others - it means that DD has choice about what to be called when she is older (her name is Elizabeth, but she is only called Beth as that is the name I love, but I like the idea that she can have so many choices about what to be called when she is older).

However, I am thinking about names for a potential DD2 (no pg yet!), and am thinking about a name I am not sure about because I like the nicknames - Margaret, to be shortened to Meg, Maggie or Daisy

My DS has a name which is a shortened version. I didn't like the formal name but love the name we chose. It is a common version of a traditional name and commonly used for adults so I don't have a problem with it.

Oh Kela, I like Margaret too. If we ever had a third DD, I think she would probably be Margaret, known as Maggie. Though I do also like Constance/Connie.

My Dad wanted my sister to be called Katie. So both parents agreed on Katherine if she was a girl. When she was born the nurse or registrar (can't remember) came to write it down and asked "Katherine with a C or with a K?" My Dad said K just as my Mum said C - they hadn't discussed the spelling! My Dad immediately said "She's just done all the hard work, C it is."

And... well he didn't feel Catie was quite right and to this day she is Catherine with no shortening (except to Cat in text messages!)