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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

aibu - to use the same name for my DNB as a friend

26 replies

QueenFee · 03/11/2008 22:36

Just wondered how people feel about this. The name I like for DB if it is a girl is Isla Grace but Isla (not sure of her second name) is a friends little girls name. I only know this friend through toddler groups etc and her DD will be 2 before my baby is born.

What I want to know is would you be offended if you were my friend?

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ScottishMummy · 03/11/2008 22:54

hell no one has copyright on a name.and getting huffy over your name is petty.sheesh you go through life you meet same names.no biggie

Original poster
QueenFee · 03/11/2008 22:57

aww thanks SM - I am scared to ask her I like the name so much!
I have another friend with DD called Isla but she is now 8 so thats actually where I got it origionally

OP posts:
Nancy66 · 03/11/2008 22:57

she'll probably be flattered

ScottishMummy · 03/11/2008 22:57

QueenFee congratulations on pg chose name you like,no one has copyright on name

Lonnie · 03/11/2008 22:59

Not at all and if she does get iffy then so what? If you like the name then stick with it..

When my dd1 was about 2 a friend from our antenatal classes had a 2nd child and named her my dd's name she actually asked me later do you mind? and I was like why would I?? She said the first time you told me she was called Phoebe I was like ohhh thats what I want for my daughter (and she got it) I was flattered and well shows she had good taste lol

ScottishMummy · 03/11/2008 22:59

isla good scottish name i approve

Original poster
QueenFee · 03/11/2008 23:03

I have scottish roots.... My DD has a welsh name and DS a scottish one so would go well with those.

I would be flattered too, but keep those opinions coming

sorry about spelling need new glasses to see what i'm typing [blind as a bat icon]

OP posts:
giraffescantdancethetango · 03/11/2008 23:05

YANBU at all. If you like the name, use it.

MamaMaiasaura · 03/11/2008 23:06

I wouldnt be offended but ds's bestfriends mum just names her newborn the same name as my baby so there is 9 months between them. SHe hadnt told me this was what she was calling him and actually told me she was calling him louie.

Both our older boys have same name and now our babies do. I dont hold the copyright on the name but it would have been nice if she had said that they were planning on that name too and what a lovely name it is.. rahter than a random text announcing his arrival. I was very nice about it tho (but still pissed off how she went about it).

ScottishMummy · 03/11/2008 23:07

fee your up the duff no one watchin your spelling

Original poster
QueenFee · 03/11/2008 23:11

@SM
Interesting point Awen, just if shes says she dosn't want me to use it and I do anyway presuming it is a girl won't she be more p'd off?

OP posts:
MamaMaiasaura · 03/11/2008 23:12

She wouldnt dare say you cant use it. You just say how much you love it.

BabyBaby123 · 04/11/2008 09:56

don't ask her QueenFee - tell her. When it next comes up in conversation, and she asks you if you've chosen names, just say 'yes, we're going for Isla too - it's a lovely name, isn't it?' What can she possibly say?

ninedragons · 04/11/2008 10:04

If she were your best friend of many years I would say no, but she is pretty tangential to your life. Go right ahead!

zzzzSLEEPWONTCOMEzzzz · 04/11/2008 10:05

I agree, I think she would be flattered. I would

missblythe · 04/11/2008 10:06

Agree with BabyBaby, you don't need to ask her permission, but would be politic to tell her, rather than just let her find out.

This happened to a friend of mine, whose very close friend chose the same name as her son.

She said she didn't care a jot-after all, she loves the name too-but she did think she woudl have liked them to ring and say, 'Hey, guess what, we're calling our son Merlin Fanjolina The Third too!', rather than just find out when the birth announcement card came.

WhatFreshelleisthis · 04/11/2008 10:09

I would be flattered if I were her, but would make sure if i were you that it was bought up in convo before I used it so all out in open

CaptainKarvol · 04/11/2008 12:58

DS's nursery nurse (key worker) called her own DS exactly the same name as him - first and middle. I thought it was a bit surprising, but very nice that DS hadn't put her off the names!

With any closer friendship I agree- mention it first but it's not about asking permission.

A friend of mine (many years ago) asked me if it was OK that she call her DD 'my' name (my given name - I had no DC then) - not because it was mine as such, but because it was unusual and I might be about her choosing it. I thought it was lovely to be asked and forewarned!

LuLuBai · 04/11/2008 13:06

QueenFee - go for it. Mention it to her first so that it doesn't come as a surprise.

DH and I have a policy of not using ANY name belonging to anyone we know and it is making it SOOOO hard to think of something to call our next DC.

Just been perusing the wierd name threads for inspiration

Original poster
QueenFee · 04/11/2008 13:11

Were completely stuck for a boys name however

Will try and speak to her but she is the sort of person who likes to be different so a bit uncertain about it. Still plenty of time to broach the subject (am only 5 weeks!

OP posts:
Spidermama · 04/11/2008 13:14

Hey!!!!! You can't have Isla. My neice is called Isla.

FrockHorror · 04/11/2008 13:14

We had similar to this situation when expecting DS. My first cousin is called Danny but we wanted to name DS Daniel (I know they're not the same name but it felt a bit weird and as if we were 'nicking' his name) so we asked my aunt and uncle (who we are very close to btw and see regularly) if they would mind, and although they said they don't like the name Daniel they didn't mind us using it.

DH and I have made it a family rule (which everyone sticks to, surprisingly!) that our DS will not be shortened to Danny (although at times it is quite tempting because it would really suit him).

I would do as LuLuBai suggests and just mention it to the other mum so it is not a shock. It is surprising how many mums get a bit funny if you name your child the same as theirs. But also, as another poster mentioned, no one owns the rights to any names so you should feel free to call your child any name you like.

purplemonkeydishwasher · 04/11/2008 13:15

no no no.
that's the name that I'VE picked.
you can't have it.
DIBS!!!!

cheesesarnie · 04/11/2008 13:16

my step sisters ds is named same as my ds1.not a family name or anything.was a bit at first but weve not had any problems.

guyFAwkesreQuiem · 04/11/2008 13:17

agree with everyone else.

If it was a family member I'd be pee-ed off (a bit) though as my and exH's family know that we deliberately chose the names we did because there was no family connection (as well as meaning and actually liking the name of course lol) my oldest SIL even commented and how amazed she was that we'd found 3 boys names beginning with "T" that hadn't already been used x number of times within the family (exH's family is HUGE).