Having a crisis about my chosen girls' name and the fact that it has negative connotations for half my family - help!

[PicassoNorks]

I am feeling rather foolish and I'm sorry this is so garbled (baby brain).

For the past near-decade I've known what girls' name I would pick for my first daughter, and now, with two months to go, I'm having a crisis!

The name is actually my grandmother's name, though I decided I liked it after seeing a character in a film with the same name (), which was the first time I'd kind of appreciated it as a name in its own right iyswim. Anyway, I got pissed and told my gran that I'd name my daughter after her and neither she nor the rest of my family has forgotten. It's one of those old lady style names that is becoming more popular again.

I like the name and my gran is very fun and glamorous. However, she also has her negative side - she's very needy, manipulative, selfish, demanding, etc etc - and I'm worried about giving my child a name which most of my family probably have mixed feelings about. Argh. DH is non-committal, but I might quiz him some more. We've never really discussed other girls' names, so I think it's come out of leftfield for him a bit.

The alternative I guess is to have my gran's name as a middle name and find something else as a first name ... At the moment I like Agatha and Agnes (though not Aggie), Martha, Magda - any more suggestions along those lines?

Or do I just go with the name we've had in midn for the past few years anyway?

Do you still want suggestions for a first name. I love Martha and would consider it but would it go well with the middle name, or does that not matter?

picasso - i named my ds after my brother who died almost 7 years ago. the only person i felt i should ask was my mum and she said it would upset her but if that's what i wanted to call him then she would try to deal with it. my sister went mad. other people were upset with my choice but didn't tell me. other people told me it was sick, disgusting etc. my nan said she wouldnt call him that and would call him someone else. as soon as he was born all was forgotten.

She will make the name her own in time so I wouldnt worry about it - give her a middle one too though - actually why not make that one her middle name and give her a different first name?

really don't compromise, this is your baby, you shouldn't be thinking of other people's feelings, they'll soon adjust. It doesn't mean you don't love them!

Thank you for the help - the name was Edith (known as Edie) and the film was the Usual Suspects (she's Gabriel Byrne's gf).

DD now 17 days old and ended up with a name that is a variant of Edith but with a different diminutive (but she can choose Edie later if she wants) (and kind, selfless granny's nickname for a middle name ).

Congrats Anglepoise!
Edith/Edie has always been a favourite of mine. Glad you're happy with her name! Families are funny things, aren't they?!

I had to read this because the stress made me smile....! We kept both of out DC names under wraps to avoid problems until they were born; noone liked DS1's name at teh time and MIL refuses (disrespectfully in my opinion) to call DS2 by his diminutive known name.

So you can't win either way!!!

Congratulations on you DD arrival...I am sure she will grow right on into her names and claim them for herself!